Im fine..yes i am..

2006-03-07T02:02:00.000+08:00

what is so special abt her that she happens to know what ever shit is going on in my life... if she really cares she could always ask me i dont need you to be my messenger.. if i needed that i would have asked you.. this might look like a small matter but its not to me.. call me sensitive or what ever but hey i cant help it can i... oh well some people can just be so argh...

work has been good besides the fact that im grounded for 40 days i got my phone back.. mum is proud of me she is amazed that i did not argue abt my groundment.. well i deserve it la anyhow im off to the third part of my life in poly mayb then i might update a lil more yeah gee i use to love bloggin now its getting a lil bored ohhhh our new supervisor plays with a black metal band hahaha awesome yeah.. haha by the way he aint anti-chirst ok... haha.. have not seen my baby i miss you angel

Nic

p.s i miss kooby...

2006-02-05T15:15:00.000+08:00

You Are 50% Weird

Normal enough to know that you're weird...
But too damn weird to do anything about it!

How Weird Are You?

2006-02-02T14:28:00.000+08:00

hello again..

i bet u guys enjoyed that lastest entry from yours truly haha.. oh well been working hard these past few days before the new year and then after tt i got sick haha so yesterday i skipped work and well instead of heading home i met tanya and glad and we hung out at macs plaza haha jus across the road from work and chilled till the bloody cigrette smoke got to us so then we decided to take a train down to tampines and had new york la for dinner sat and chatted about tanya and her new love haha i hate it when ppl get so in love hahaha its sooooo damn mushy YOU HEAR THAT MISS RICHARDSON hahaha.. love birds hahaha... rained and moved to BK where glad became a dick and wanted to leave so damn early.. so poor me and tanya love had to head home.. :(... yes i was sad... but i swear man haha the walk to the bus stop was FUN haha the talk at the stop was FUN and hahahah we were idiots on the bus cos we were talking abt hahaha.. nevermind and well the laughs jus came and never went away hahahha.. went to see my baby at her place..:D haha.. then finally came home... well ppl my dear helper Jodi is gone back so now my room is a dump hahah.. which means ppl u can crash over here again hahah:)...ok tmr is class reunion and i hope ppl come.. i do miss the class though now who will ;isten to my nonsense...haiz miss kooby soooo much have not met u guys since like forever though we all are so damn busy with work i hardly even get to see Angel.. gee.. oh well... i got a nice suprise for a beautiful soomeone hahaha..btw NIK I STILL LOVE U ahahahha... smile k lil babe

ok peeps im out
Nic
********************SORRY SHARP NO MORE STUFF ABT SEX..hahah**********************

2006-01-26T19:21:00.000+08:00

hello people...

its been forever.. i know im jus sooo lazy to update my blog and all.. i dont think anyone reads it though oh nooo im becoming GLADYS!!!...hahah..anyhow... i had an awesomely fantastic party on jan7th haha my bro..yi ling.. tanya..sharifah..mel..nor..sharon..cyn and jon and a whole load of my bro's friends.. haha.. wel see the fun part was buying the alcohol ad hidding it hahah and drinking and seeing people get drunk although they say they arent haha.. anyhow im working at Dome now with glad and rochelle.. and since nik works jus a stop away i think we will be seeing eachother a lot hahah.. tanya love one day of work and u cant tahan rite hahahah...sharifah calls me sat morning to ask me to help work cos u ppl ar hahah go party and cant work haiz haiz hahah... well been busy with work and lazying around.. if u ask me i dont mind the whole working experience makes u feel all grown up and learning how to have good time management althoug i suck at tt .. okok im bored here is something i find interesting...

Female ejaculation is not a glorified pee. since it is impossible to pee during sex our muscular contrations of an orgasm close off the bladder and prevent urination.... our ejaculation is usually clear and milky and does not stink of pee even though it comes from the urethra..ejaculation is most of the time triggeres when the G spot is stimulated... if u inserted ur finger one to two inches in ur *ahem* u would feel ur G spot once touched u would feel the urge to pee and since no one smart pees during sex u EJACULATE!!!!...have a great SEX life.. sadly we SINGAPOREANS are ranked only 40th in the world sex survey among 41 countries...

Nic

2005-12-03T22:24:00.000+08:00

hey hey wow my blog is fucking dead but oh welll hu cares la..im love sick and have like 30 days to go before im happy haha..today i went out with anishia and chantel..was fun la although i got bullied like half the time because those two buggers together are jus HELL!!!..hahaha but it was fun la..ani was nice enough to bring me out although ani i noe u tried to cheer me up but not bad la 3/4hahaha..
anyhow it was nice going out with those two nuts la first time three of us were out as normal friends hahahah "if u noe wad i mean" hahaha...

i miss my Kooby babes la..haha MEL, NOR,TAN and SHAR hahah those girls are the best best man..hahha guys we need to go out together la i noe u guys are broke la but come on la!! SAVE hhahah..MEL is back today YES!! hahaha i think im suppose to go Job hunting with her i think im going to work at HMV wad do u think??...tanya love is really enjoying her fucking self like crazy man tt girl clubs like there is no tmr la hahah...oh well i love u kooby..

ally..jas...sharp i noe i owe u a date hahah jus give me time k guys hahah..especially ally i miss u like fuck la girl and there is so much i wanna tell u haha but no time...it was great seein u at farewell..

eh my dear bestfriends u noe hu u are! i miss u guys too so we need to get our asses off and go out..ok sharon i understand u will only go out once u get tt job rite..hahah $$$$$

eh love i miss u soooooo much and trust me i cant wait for the first..i love u!

NIC

2005-11-22T23:27:00.000+08:00

ITS FINALLY OVER haha..

went to watch harry potter today well i think i liked the second movie better though but i had great company so hahha it made up for it..today the truth came out..im glad it did i mean finally..after one yr its out..i jus hope that things will eb ok now ..i noe u wanna cool down and think things thru but hey im not tt bothered so u can take ur time..i feel that other friendships are important but some jus some are not..anyhow im free for 6 months so ppl u may ask me out haha..well im booked till dec though by my lil one hhahah..anyway im off now jus came to be happy..

Nic

2005-10-20T23:15:00.000+08:00

ok my dear blog i noe we have been apart for sooo long and there has jus been soo much to tell u but well..i guess this blog is only going to be effective from after Nov 22 haha but before i go on my long break here is something i got out from a MAGazine..." someone once told me that when it comes to love you should never regret the seemingly silly or weird things you do for it. there is no shame in liking someone and making the first move. Even if she or he does not reciprocate atleast you know you did something about it instead of letting it slip away"..something to reflect on yeah guys hahah..well i've found my one and im glad..:D

Nic

2005-08-14T23:48:00.000+08:00

so...lets see...i din try...welll...i walked up and said hi..i even stood there to get introduced..its fine tt im not ur bestfriend anymore..so i was introduced as nic..i din complain..i came there twice to talk..guess u cant rmbr..u sat with the group i made fun of u as i always do to get the conversation going..well..if all tt aint trying then fine...how can i get use to him when u don even make it a point to get us to noe each other..fine my fault...so u tried huh?..well...its good u did..so much for being frens..din even think u would care abt my ggma...cos honestly i don see u ever being there for me..im not saying this for any reason im saying what i feel if u think its him its not...cos i love another..

Alter Bridge

"In Loving Memory"

Thanks for all you've done
I've missed you for so long
I can't believe you're gone
You still live in me
I feel you in the wind
You guide me constantly

I've never knew what it was to be alone, no
Cause you were always there for me
You were always there waiting
And ill come home and I miss your face so
Smiling down on me
I close my eyes to see

And I know, you're a part of me
And it's your song that sets me free
I sing it while I feel I can't hold on
I sing tonight cause it comforts me

I carry the things that remind me of you
In loving memory of
The one that was so true
Your were as kind as you could be
And even though you're gone
You still mean the world to me

I've never knew what it was to be alone, no
Cause you were always there for me
You were always there waiting
But now I come home and it's not the same, no
It feels empty and alone
I can't believe you're gone

And I know, you're a part of me
And it's your song that sets me free
I sing it while I feel I can't hold on
I sing tonight cause it comforts me

I'm glad he set you free from sorrow
I'll still love you more tomorrow
And you will be here with me still

And what you did you did with feeling
And You always found the meaning
And you always will
And you always will
And you always will

Ooo's

And I know, you're a part of me
And it's your song that sets me free
I sing it while I feel I can't hold on
I sing tonight cause it comforts me
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

sometimes u wonder if he knew wad was going through ur mind and if he took things away because u took them for granted..was i one of those tt were taking u for granted...i feel tt guilt in me because now ur gone and i cant ever see u again..yes i will miss u..i love u...

Nic
//the pain of losing someone dear is more pain then heart ache//

2005-08-08T19:28:00.000+08:00

wow!! today was sports day and guess wad!!..FRANCIS WON AGAIN LIKE WAD THE HELL LA My dear house Bakita was like second la hahah...for five years in that school and its always been francis oh well wad the hell la...played tigeress cup and won against 5.1 hahah but we lost to the teachers in the finals la ahahah..sad la..oh well...after tt i went out with my bro and love!..was fun la second time we three went out together and guess who i saw my blood bro and nats hahah..gave him a shock hahaha..oh well...

saturday was fun at ally's party made friends with her Godpa and well i was very sociable and so was love...it was fun but something made me upset..some one who i knew sooo well did not take the iniciative to come and talk to me she jus pretended tt i did not exist atleast i take my hat off to one who tried even though she was uncomfortable she tried and even was concerned if i was ok..thats a friend...unlike this other person...sometimes i wonder why i try...its bullshit la...although it was great to see u..but it was shit at the same time...u din even try...so much for wanting to be friend's...

Nic

2005-07-31T23:08:00.000+08:00

Twas this nite i saw an angel
And dreamt of thy face
Her eyes of bright summer
Staring at every passion
Made thee fall into her open pleasure
But if the Lord willed thee to die this day
Thee would plea
To keep thee still
Until her face is seen
Then so must his will

Nic

2005-07-20T22:44:00.000+08:00

hahaha..sorry abt tt sad entry well not sad la jus worried entry la hahah..anyway i went for the good charlotte concert haha was awesome man haahh i went with tanya jill shep sam and sheps fren and oh yes the twins hahaha was fun la although my coolio cousin got in damn early la hahah funny bum noe tt girl hahah..anyhow for more info pl look for me so i can bragg abt how good it was hahah..anyhow times have been hard for me i have been sick since thursday and all..gee rite now i lost my voice and cyn thinks its sexier than my normal voice wad the hell!!!
sucks noe hahah i cant communicate with anyone cos i end up gettin misunderstood..haha its funny la...anyhow like i said im home this whole week so ya its not the best la..haha..

have u ever thought abt how much u actually loved someone and what the person has done to change u..and how the person has impacted ur life in many small yet evident ways...when i was asked abt my feelings it reassured wad they stood for and how much i really cared...

have u also wondered if u should give up everything because its so hard to get along...and if its worth it or not..if its not wad u want BUT wad u have to do..its the mind over the heart beacuse the heart longs to understand...

NIC

2005-07-17T21:42:00.000+08:00

i don noe why u feel that way mayb its me but i want u to noe that im not letting go not after sooo long cos u mean more to me than anything else in this world...there is nothing more i want...YOU HAD ME AT HELLO...
Nic

2005-06-30T20:06:00.000+08:00

there comes a point in our lives where we realise who really will be there for u through thick and thin and who would even give her life for u...i figured tt out..i thought i had five close frens who would stick by me and would always be my shoulder to cry on..five frens who had planned to work hard together to prove to everyone that we can make it no matter what four frens with one at heart who went overseas together and strengthen our bonds..five frens who never left and was always there five fren who were truthful and were humble people..somehow i wonder how blind i was how i could not see that one day two would jus walk away like nothing mattered..the two i cherished..its hard to forget the hurt..thats why i can only forgive u..and the only reason how i can do tt is cos i still love u both..forgetting it is going to take time..alot of time..mayb five of us were not meant to be..but since two of u left the three of us have been able to realise how important frendships are and when i really think abt it..these are my true friends..like u jo its not tt im saying u guys are not..but honestly..i noe who my true frens are and who would be there for me..we three need tt time and space away for now so being frens would not be easy but im not saying we cant..like i said i forgive u all and love u all...

hey tan and shar..no worries..things are going fine and tts how we like it..thank you for giving me a friendship i would treasure and remember my whole life..Kooby brody!..hahah...oh my O.C tonight wahahha...tts going to cheer up my all so gloomy day..haha anyhow today school was fun la especially accs tutorial when i sat with sharon and annoyed her like fuck la hahha..anyhow after tuitorials i saw my bites haha we talked for a while before i and shar waited ONE FUCKING hour for char la hahha anyhow during tt time we were touring the school and ended up in the CB area when Leng ased D to play shar "happy birthday" haha that was like damn nice la haha i bet shar was happy la..anyhow went over to tan's place to tell her abt geog homework and A.LIM!!! oh when we went over tan was in the shower so we quickly hide in her room and char hid in the cupborad ahah was damn funny la tanya took so long to realise tt char was in the cupborad la hahha..anyhow.. had dinner there and well came home la..char was being an ass la she fucking wore some stupid white pointy shoes la haha..anyhow thanks for the dinner!.

Nic

//when a bestfren lets u all so down..10//

2005-06-29T17:38:00.000+08:00

haiz...

been hearing so much of stuff abt council and well im not happy la its screwed up this year and thats the whole truth. im upset with what ever i heard and what ever has been done but well i guess this is where u wanna belive or start believing in ppl...

its over now it really is the pass 7 months with u guys were great but i guess we wanted to work things out and they just did not go as planned and now with the little adjustments im happy...jus with the three of us i am happy somehow i noe where u stand in my life..the five of u will always br my frens and even though we had or ups and downs and i admite tt im still upset im not judgin u for who u are cos u are great ppl but i judge u for ur actions..every one makes mistakes and i myself made them too so here it goes... i am angry yes i am angry at the way you think its fine to jus pretend things are ok and like no one bother..i am hurt that this has to happen because we all were so close we were almost like family.i regret not doing more in the group and not trying hard enuff...but i do appreciate so much the way you have been here for me through my highest highs*winks* haha and my lowest lows...no one can do tt seriously i want for all of us to remain good and loving fren to one another and i will do my part to make sure this happens..i forgive u all and i love u all...

Nic

2005-06-24T21:59:00.000+08:00

wow school is like starting next week and well i have not finished all my homework except SS la haha and Geog and accts hah..ok not a good thing though...

anyhow things have been crazy...doing crazy stuff with people jus being me again i guess..its hard to imgine some stuff gone when there was so much of it...in the slip of the moment its like gone away..stuff i cant explain myself...anyhow...

went to the beach finally with dar!..haha yes yes we played alot la haha and well hu got wet ar?! hahahah poor dar was like wet till home hahha..

oh me and chopsticks had a scary wednesday hahah...yes yes call it fate la but three times was fucking scary la hahah...anyhow thank God ur mum has bad memory hahah...and my dad does not care much haha...

ok nothing much to say la wait till sch opens la

Nic

2005-06-12T22:22:00.000+08:00

YOUR THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN MAKE MY HEART BEAT FAST AND SLOW AT THE SAME TIME..I DONT KNOW HOW AND I CANT TELL YOU WHEN BUT ITS TRUE ITS ALL ABOUT YOU...I HAVE ESCAPED

NIC

2005-06-05T21:23:00.000+08:00

hey everyone im back!!!!

yes yes i am back from taman negara and trust me it was damn bloody fun la..
all you ppl hu did not want to go or thought that it woul have been boring well you could say you were very wrong la..well although we did not have the best accomodations like toilets and bedrooms wad do u expect rite ur kinda like in the middle of the rain forest ya?!

ok so basically on DAY ONE i was kinda home sick la i admite i kinda did not know why i decided to go for this i mean was this wad i really wanted than i thought hey maybe its a good thing..so yes after getting all warmed up in the train nothing really mattered i had my bestfriend sharon i had my chomps Tanya Sam and Jo with me and a whole load of classmates and school mates like claire and jillian so yes it was fun la..

we arrived on DAY TWO at 5.00am and we had to walk in the dark and everything to our local hotel haha it was not the best but hey its a backpackers trip so wad do u expect rite?..and we managed to fit a record of 7 ppl on one single and double bed for 45mins before we got ready to travel to taman negara..and well we had breakfast and set of on our three hour boat ride to taman negara the water was jus beautiful and the wind was great the view was also a classic one and hey its an experience i don wanna forget haha jus one problem my ass got numb after one hour haha but i could not stand up la haha cos well the whole boat would have toppoled over la haha so yes and it was funny cos one of our other boats got smacked into a rock so it was kinda "sinking" so that was the only major accident la..
anyway we arrivied at taman negara and trust me we were so angry tt the teachers had chalets to live in while we got hoetels with moths in the toilets and bugs trustt we buggs as big as two index fingers haha now u noe how big!!!..yes yes and we even got attacked by monkeys haha i will get to that though haha...ok so after having the news broken to us abt where we were going to stay..we set of for lunch and than to do our river studies and trust me it was FUN FUN FUN the water upstream is so clean and taste like clear tap water it was like heaven and you would think that we would get a stomach ache rite but hey we did not even get it.. after washing up and having loads of fun we went to the nite market and trust me its really funny to check out their imitation items there its funny la hahah!!..and well stuff like SWATCH becoming SWETCH hahahha ok shall not be mean la and u nor the kids there drive motor bikes at the age of abt 10!!!!!that im serious k!!! anyway day two was a blast as u can see la...

now DAY THREE we went hiking and my my my it was damn tiring i almost died believe it or not i really almost died k and tha=n to top it of we had to do the canopy walk and for those who know me well would noe that heights and me dont really go together la so yes i was fucking scared la haha and i even got stung by a BEE trust me it was pain and well that did not really help the fact that i was scared of heights and the bee stung me so i only could use one hand to climb la and the best part is the guy was so calm abt it he was like"oh don worry hurts for jus five mins la" wad the hell it was damn pain la but thank God i was stung for jus one time not like sam who kena like three times la haha.. after that we had our lunch at a floating resturant and the people was like extremely friendly la!and not only were the ppl nice the food ax well was like heaven ..we than visited the orang usli village and its jus so interesting how they really make use of everything around them to make stuff and trust me it was jus so interesting la i really admire those people a whole load..haha now here comes the fun part when we went rapid shooting M'SIA style hahah it was damn fun la i was like drenched like i also don noe how to say la.. haha it was fun la..later we had dinner and than the nite walk and it was so fun we saw so many anials fucking la haha and let me tell u the buggs are the raunchiest living creatures haha when they fuck u jus can start thinking of 50cents candy shop man haha...so well that was it la day three oh!!! by the way we had two big lizards sleeping with us haha...

DAY FOUR we went cave exploring and trust me it was fun fun fun haha!! i never did such climbing and squeezing before it was amazing la jus the view and the formations and everything it was jus great man i really enjoyed it so so much man but!!i regret not bringig my camera in there la and so did everyone else la..haiz but well i thought tt it mite get damaged so ya!...after tt we had our shower and moved to tekam plantation and now that was where we got the first class treatment man haha it was like a nice chalet la we washed up and like i said the food jus was great la haha and well we played cards and told ghost stories and ate DURIANS hahah yes yes even with my ulcer la...nothing much for day four la had more fre time though//

DAY FIVEk now it was like the last day indirectly so i made the best of it we had to do our settlement study so yes my group was lucky we had mr poh and u noe rite the way he spoils us haha yes yes we got him to treat us to pizza,ice cream and fries hahaha and than we went shopping and i started taking photots of all the stupid thinga u see in m'sia haha it was funny la anyhow we had dinner tt was not tt good la trust me the village food is better la hahha..than we jus chilled out by watching tv and playing cards and teaching claire how to play pile up haha now she thinks she has lost her virginity hahah!!!..anyhow slept at lik 11.30 got up at 12.10 to get ready to leave for singapore

DAY SIX like i said we got up early in the moring did our walk to the railway stationa dn yes thank GOd it was only delayed for 20 mins and not three hours la haha in the mean time miss A.lim was telling us jokes..yes yes yes A.lim telling jokes and trust me some of them were LAME!!!! hahah but it was fun la than came the train and guess wad the fucking trains airconw as not working so it was like a sona la!! but oh well i slept all the way to singapore la haha...mum picked me up with my bro i went home showered and wemt to mass man the urban life is so noisy adn all i miss the rural life la haha...anyhow i plan to study tmr la so yes i guess thats about it la or my trip anyhow...

alot of ppl were definately missed when i was there soyes espescially my chopsticks haha..ok i guess thats all for now la..
CIAO
NIC

2005-05-21T23:30:00.000+08:00

wow..its been more than tem days since i have been here well lets start with the MYE its not as if im as smart as boney la hahah..ya i only passed my EL la with a fucking C6 la fuck but atleast i passed that if i did not my mum would screw me man hahah..well the rest was bad i had like a D7 for my sciences and E8 for tamil and the rest were F9's ya for accounts humanties and maths fuck it la i never got F9 for my maths shits i always get like B3 for maths oh well its a fucking wake up call..

parents nite is on friday and my mum is coming to see miss Lim at 8 and if im not wrong i think tanya Jo and sam mite be staying over la i doubt sharifah can la so ya my house is open for overnite staying so anyone wanna come!?!...

next next monday is the mother tongue Olevel and yes yes i have been studing i need to get a C6 for miss chua wihich is so not going to happen la i jus want a D7 thats all man..anyway after that im leaving for Taman Negara for like wad 5 days man i hope its fun la i guess its the best time to jus take it easy and to relax but im going to miss ppl very much but oh well..i shall see u soon ya!...

well thats about it for now...

Sunshines
Nic

** Oh my beating heart wants you and my empty arms need you don you go and never try to send me away**

2005-05-10T23:36:00.000+08:00

its the MYE and i actually don give a fuck abt the exam until the math paper woke me up now im like working my butt off i wanna sign up for that stupid JC programe that the MOE is wanting to have if i have to sign up for a JC i wanna sign up for CJC but the thing is my forte is in the {FA and CJC is not say tt good in their PFA la so i mite wanna sign up for TJC cos the have a good ensemble ya and well VJC is out of my league hahah...so ya TJC or CJC wanna try JC life first la and well i wanna work hard for prelim so i can get a place there but well it all depends la i wanna really go to the poly though ahahah..ya..

oh today wa fun we got caught in a real heavy down pour man but it was fun la ahahah...oh well in the end we went to the HI room to study and well it was good la cyn laura and gloria joined us and yes yes i convinced MRS Boo to try a new way to motivate the girls to study hard and yes 5.2 will be the first N.A class to score really well for the O level with A1,A2 and B3 for sciences and the same for maths hahah...well B3 for maths is good enuff for me la hahah...not asking for much la...

tmr is accounts day man hahah....die die la but Thank God for Patel if not i can forget abt doing my O level ya..Friday mite have party time hahaha...oh well im real tired now so i guess im off

**NOW IM THINKING OF YOU WHEN I CANT EXPLAIN THE FEELING BUT I KNOW THAT ITS REAL WHEN I HOLD YOU WHEN I SAW YOU ..YOU KNOW..I KNEW I COULD NOT LIVE WITHOUT YOU EVER IN MY LIFE**

Sunshines
Nic

//eh come back soon//
//sorry i have been so busy lately cant even call and talk to u and see if ur fine don b mad k..love ya!//
//5/2 wake up and smell the coffee..//

!) somehow things seem to be working out the way it should but wad if...

2005-04-18T19:31:00.000+08:00

so fucking tired!! i swear i am man...haiz last nite was ally's confi and man did she look B.E.A UTIFUL!!...haha well hope u liked the flowers babe!...oh and our dear charmaine was as pretty as ever..mind me saying i think that when bungs dress like proper girls they are actually real pretty hahah!!!..:P...ok rite rite...

oh went to the confi with ade sharon and my boney!..saw laura's ex and well according to boney im like him :X!!!...ok well..anyhow saw ani,dar,chow and pat there i must say felt kinda funny seein dar there la mayb because of some shit stuff but oh well things happen for a reason and well normally we aint so cold towards eachother but guess oh well forget it..

anyway missed the fucking shuttle to went to the bus stop and took 15 home la ya man was it a long ride but it was good jus being silent hahaha!!!!...went down to whitesands cos boney was hungry but guess wad...nothing for her to eat so we jus chilled there for a while before setting off to changi!!!...yes yes the all so haunted changi..but i mus say with the flying insects and the rats it was fun la..

sent boney back than went home and was too damn tired to do anythin mayb tts y i was so bleah to dar..guess i should be sorry abt it ya!?..so here..sorry...

school was okok la like i said daisy blew up till she was lik <...> close to breaking down i swear tt clown needs the anti depressents more than me haha....oh well now because of tt bum i gotta like do ten accounts questions ass!!...

anyhow tt was my day la..oh ya one more thing... LEAVE MY COUSIN OUTTA UR STINKING SHIT WITH ME! NO ASS HAS THE RIGHT TO CALL HER A FUCKING LIAR COS I TOLD HER TO LIE IN UR FUCKING FACE I PROMISE IF I FIND OUT HU THE FUCK U ARE..I WILL PERSONALLY KICK UR BLACK ASS TILL ITS RED!!!...SO LEAVE HER ALONE!...

alrite thats all! :D
NIC

//have a safe trip ani and bring me back a nice surfer dude!//
//hey chompys..missed u guys on fri thanks jo tanya and sharifah for coming down to meet me made my day!! :D//

!)!)!)!)!) imagine someone shoots u in the heart and digs out that bullet from it and shoots that same spot again...that much pain can never ever heal..!)!)!)!)

2005-04-15T22:31:00.000+08:00

Its been a totally rough week
been like falling ill most of the time and it sucks la
i mean its jus been like three times i went to the doc already
geex its eva since tt hand foot and mouth tt my immune system has become so long haiz...today the girls had their sectionals hope it went well la haiz haiz

oh congrads to the beautiful MODERN DANCERS for getting a Gold with Honours award haah finally broke th chain ya haha and to our dear BAND congrads for the SILVER!!! go girls!wow now i have so much pressure..haiz..oh well hope we get atleast a silver..

tmr is Acies i hope it goes well la..but we aint going with the "small fries" haha sec fives going on their own..haha tts wad i call mature haha..anyway

like i said its been a rough week haiz got so pissed off with someone tt i jus lost it and seriously i have not gotten tt angry since like foreva and well u could say i din expect it from tt somone la jus dissapointed in tt person and really upset abt it..haiz...

anyway ani ur going off to aust and yes yes la i will miss u *rolls eyes* ahaaha =Pjoking la!! hahah..anyway u better be good there ya haha..i noe u will miss me too haha...

ok well chomps are happy nowdays if not in love than frenship makes up for the love ya guys!!i love u guys
btw thanks Jo,Tanya and sharifah for being the most lovely people on earth cos they came to give me my phone and my stuff and well tt was the best part of my day not going to school loves loves guys!!

okok im off now nite!Nic
!)upset and angry and confused!)

2005-04-05T22:29:00.000+08:00

THE KILLERS LYRICS

"Mr Brightside"

I'm coming out of my cage
And I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I’m falling asleep
And she’s calling a cab
While he’s having a smoke
And she’s taking a drag
Now they’re going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it’s all in my head
But she’s touching his—chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go

I just can’t look its killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it’s just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
‘Cause I’m Mr Brightside

I’m coming out of my cage
And I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I’m falling asleep
And she’s calling a cab
While he’s having a smoke
And she’s taking a drag
Now they’re going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it’s all in my head
But she’s touching his—chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go

Cause I just can’t look its killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it’s just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
‘Cause I’m Mr Brightside

I never...
I never...
I never...
I never...
************************
hmmm...ok so im in love with this song and something else
had an ok day today la
nothing much jus a bad day for tanya i guess

oh ya btw congrads INDIAN DANCE for getting a GOLD in the SYF..yes yes
second one in a row real proud of u guys

decided to take myself out of SYF i cant do it anymore la..
first i stayed for the ensemble but now they don really need me so ya
im off la..haha..

today was fun boney came over la and yes as always were always full of nonsense okok la mayb not that person all the time la im the nonsensical bum that talks to much la haha..oh well..anyway i love you boney!

okok so chomps are not really in a good mood today but oh lets put it behind us la tmr is CHOMPS DAY wow 4th anni wow so happy..will be having recess with em...anyway im off now la nothing much to say...

sunshines
Nic

// now i don fear that u'd hurt me like how i have hurt before..//

!) It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss!)

2005-04-02T20:49:00.000+08:00

tired...and sleepy..but oh well...
today was a funny day man..i got up at 5.50 to go for mass with my mum who like ended up leaving for church without me la..and u see if i don go for mass i only gotta get up at 7.15..so from 6 till than i jus stayed up watching MTV haha nice nice songs i must say..haha..they even got stuck in my heard...especially tt song from the Killers..MR BRIGHTSIDE...nice song man..

anyway went for legion and i mus say it has been a long time since i cracked up jokes during tt time man haha..was funny teasing glad la haha poor girl well she was the one who asked me to liven up the meeting wad?!...hhaha after legion went to boney's house hahah!!..was fun la jus crapping was like suppose to watch "de lovely" but ended up talking from like 11.30 till 4.30 haha..but i enjoyed the company alot!!..haha..after tt went to mass and i was like falling asleep half the time la haha..was funny..oh my and i saw sam's rival in church haha Bakwah!!..and she was going where eva i was going man ...bummer!! saw my sunflowers mum at the bus stopped and had a lil chat la..than came home

pass week has been so up tight..was sick and all tt sorta crap la but i guess im doing fine more like trying to do fine la..putting feelings at the back of my head and stepping forward...

okok i gtg now la..promise to have a better entry soon k...

sunshines
Nic

//hey chompies...thanks for all tt u have done..Jo take it a step at a time,sharifah im so happy for u haha u should stop smiling so much haha,sam in time ur heart would heal and things will seem better,Sa haha wad can i say abt my bro ya,Tanya don hurt ppl ya think carefully!!,seah always there to listen hmm..Rachie baby!!..hahah u ar..need to focus on wad u want!!..//
//hey dar hope u did well for ur exams ya mus do me proud//
//My boney!!!...hahha...//

2005-03-16T19:00:00.000+08:00

Hey hey everyone

ok so yes im finally bloggin again but oh well cant help it la jus have been busy.anyway family carnival went well la was surprised at the over whelming response from the crowd la..yes yes and was so happy that mrs loh got dunked that woman deserved it man..haha but "Right on!" miss chua !!proud u gave up urself for ur council hahah..well anyway jas insisted i try the dunking machine and well i did in the end jus said i'd do it once la but ppl started paying for me to get dunked so kena like four times la..WTH!!!..anyway ya had CCA today and it was bleah la..i love my girls in the ensemble i see 80% of them really working hard and wanting that gold but there is jus that 20% that spoil everything else..haiz we are not there yet la..feels like shit but i jus hope we get a silver tts all i ask a silver...

Ever since that special somone went for holiday i kinda had time to talk and think about my past tt i jus never managed to settle and well thank God i finally settled stuff with all now...i hope u noe hu is hu ya..'

*hey there ur my first and well ya i noe its not been easy for u to move on with tt person tt ur dating now but tt person is lucky to have u cos ur a real caring person and u jus brighten up everyone's day..its sad tt i din treasure it but oh well tts the past and we have to learn from it and move on..the worst part abt r/s is tt its hard to move on and everytime we keep thinking abt it..the only way to make our frenship work is to put the past behind us...its hard no one said it was easy but i noe u can do it..hope u start a new journey with tt someone..it will be a fun one im sure!..

* hmmm wAd more can i say but sorry..although it seems to be the hardest word..things i have done i do regret.. things i do i have guilt..but somehow ur always the forgiving soul..thank u for tt..we both made mistakes before and well once bitten twice shy so mayb u noe y im doing wad im doing now..its time to be mature and have self control..haha..yes yes sounds damn wrong la but yes...i had many fun times with u and many memories i will treasure and wad eva it is im always here ya..i hope u will be happy in time to come..

* haha my lil sunflower wad is there to say but i cant believe it was jus one whole misunderstanding..ya ..its sad tt it ended in a real dumb way ya..there was like no head and no tail to the ending ya and we jus left things as they were for like 8 months man..and yesterday we finally got it settled..no need to say sorry for treating me like shit and no need to say sorry for taking me for granted i guess i never could express myself and thats my fault la..thank you for being so open abt it now and for also still being a good fren to me in all ways..even after wad we went through..like wad u said it don matter if we are together or not we were still frens...yes and ur also my most trusted fren and i treasure tt fact..and thanks for the well wishes with that wonderful someone...

*your not my past u are my present and i hope my future..wadeva i went through with each of the people above is diff from what im going through with you.. im happy that right now i have u to share my feelings with and wad eva nonsense i irritate u with..somehow u make me feel special and contented..there are things i have done that have made u upset and insecure but i want u to noe tt wad eva it is i will treasure u from the bottom of my heart cos i lost u once and will not lose u again...

okok im done with those four...anyhow its going to be a rough week with all the cca practises and well im not hoping for much jus one proper holiday man haha..easter is finally coming hahah got eggs to look forward too!!!..yay!!..anyway tts it from me now la..im off..loves!

SUnshines
Nic

//,my dear best frens...i miss one of u cos ur away from me haha looks like i only got sharon chantel and the chomps for now haha sads la!!..anyway..i love u guys!!//

//Chomps..ur always there to see my stand tall and well even when i fall ur the people i can turn to when im feeling down and low thanks for always being there ...i hope i have been there for u ppl too..oh ya and jo i also finally realised tt all the chomps blogs are like black la!!haha...eh tanya i hear sweet gossips..mus tell ya!!..//

****I HOPE UR SAFE WHERE EVA U ARE I MISS UR VOICE I WANNA CALL U BUT OH WELL ITS JUS SO EXPENSIVE AND I DON NOE WHERE TO REACH U..I MISS UR HUGGES AND KISSES AND JUS U BEING THERE..HAIZ I CANT WAIT FOR THE WEEKS TO GO BY COS I MISS U...HAIZ HAIZ...

2005-03-07T23:28:00.000+08:00

okokok..fine its a f***ed up day for me today its jus a real bad day la besides seeing someone and talking to my frens and finally passing my bio test and i mean finally..everything was jus F***ed up to the core man.

firstly Mr T wanted to call my parents y?! cos he said i din hand in two sets of my homeowrk like wad the F*** he was the one hu said he don wanna mark cos no point cos that two times i was not in school la..but wad eva to him atleast tt ass was nice enough to take my name of the "call ur parents" list la..than after tt there was accts lesson and u noe since our new accts teacher for the time being is tt shit faced D*** T** rite..well honestly she is jus damn slow but forget tt i was really urgent to visit the loo cos i was having my *ahem* and she asked me if it was urgent and well duh i said yes la than she asked me the most stupidest thing a teacher would ask " are u leaking?" like wad the F*** wad shit ass question is tt like its personal bitch it aint none of ur business if im leaking or shitting in my pants!!!...nevermind i said no im not leaking but i need the toilet la than she asked another question "are u havingur period?" i mean come one la tts private too i mean as a woman don tell me ur tt dumb la..haiz okok fine nevermind i forgive tt sick tit woman cos well she is jus an old hag sadly and God forgive me!..later there was tamil class and oh boy this was when my blood started to bloi inside and we all noe don make nic angry cos when she blows it all comes out...anyway..u see i don stay back on wednesdays for tamil tutorial la and so wad eva work she gives during that time i only have to give it on monday..and so last wed i left tamil class early and well after i left she gave the class a piece of work to do which i duh din noe about la and so when today she was gong through the answers in class i din have any answers except for two sections which i did outta my own hard work la..but tt bitch din give a f*** about tt she yelled at me at the top of her voice and well atleast i din get anything she said la ha to tt but i mean comeon its ur fucking fault and u wanna come here and show ur shit like wad the F*** lahz..asshole...cant stand that bitch la...anyway there is more to it jus that i don wanna type anymore..anyway im off now its late...

*TOOTED* up
Nic
over and over and over again its jus shit la..i don believe in it anymore

2005-03-04T23:03:00.000+08:00

ok fine i should updated but jus busy studying la..recent events would be SYF camp fun la but bleah cos i doubt my girls will get gold with honours let alone gold la..ya

sliently in the nite she waits
waits
and waits

for something she does not believe in
yet she waits
waits and waits

in the cold winter wind and
the hot summer heat
she waits
waits and waits

she waits for something she never knew

hmmmm.....

if stars disappeared and
if rain never fell
and if the sun stopped shinning
and if the moon never came out...

(finish it)....

look at that bitch talking poppycock in a F***ing uncool colloquial

i promise you i dont wanna miss a thing...i love you and your in my heart
stars may disappear and rain may never fall the sun might stop shinning and the moon never come out but you alone i still will love you alone.

sunshines
NIC
(utter bullshit sometimes lets it all out)

"HANDS OFF!!!"

2005-02-18T15:53:00.000+08:00

okok fine i know its been a long time since i blogged but im telling u man this is a hit story ...yes yes a hit!!!

Nic's version (Check tanya's blog for her verion)
[7.15]..okok so i arrived in school today with my dear cousin and i must say we were having a good conversation about some guitar thing and well it was important la really it was..it was like our lil bonding session so anyway i was walking in with her when suddenly at the entrance of the festival court stood my "horror"

[7.18] there she was jus looking at me and about to pounch on to me like what she normally does..i must say its not the her u think..in horror i screamed" NOOOOOOOO!!!!" and she ran and jumped to hug me..i screamed at my cousin for help but she had her file so she jus smiled and walked off...we twisted and turned and i struggeled my way out of her grip..i finally did and ran..yes yes i ran like the wind or even faster..i did not where i was running jus away...*hoot hoot hoot*...

[7.20] at a distance i saw salvation it was tanya marking her attendence and i screamed her name"TANYA!!!!" with all my might and as i jumped over the bags with that "crazy" girl running after me..*hoot hoot hoot*..tanya knowing about this nit wit strectched out her hands i embrace to save me from that girl!!..i pounced on to tanya like a lil koala bear as she said..hahah and we both jus hugged..

[7.20 and a few seconds] that "crazy" girl had her hands not only asround me but around tanya as well *hoot hoot hoot* it was damn damn funny i was screamin "let go..noo!!" and tanya was yelling"get off get off!!!" hahha and God noes how she jus let go and that was the last i saw her...

[7.24..a few secs before sch] *hoot hoot hoot* me and my frens were gossiping abt how scary she is and well yes yes how traumatised i have become...

[7.25] school bell rings and off i went for my late coming duty....

[7.43]there i was minding my own business and talking to my fellow mates when suddenly out of the blue that "crazy" girl jus came at my side and pinched my cheeks!!!like OMG scary rite!!..i think she was accompanying her classmate to the G.O la ya okok so i jus smiled to show that i was still ok and all..and u noe wad!!!...

[7.45] there she was coming out of the G.O i was hoping that she would not do anything to me to my horror she touched me on my side!!..like wad the hell rite..i was so bloddy freaked can..geex its like omg la!!...

okok so the day went on as usual the laughed the beoing *hoot hoot hoot*!!!..and the annoying..saw my potato during recess and well annoyed her as usual la hahah..yes so anyway today was fun la..now in the conexion with tanya and sharifah..haha poor sharifah i left her to finish the jig saw by herself *hoot hoot hoot* well i will go help once done here..okok so cant wait for SYF camp next friday *hoot hoot hoot*..going to be sooo fun yet sooo stressed im noe im going to be angry and start shouting but oh well GOLD WITH HONURS rite?!..hahah..okok..

[1.50]attended prefects meeting and oh well im not say tt happy with them la pity the prefects now la but oh well i also feel sorry for the council la..

[2.10]walked into the canteen and yes yes i admite im shit scared of the crazy girl that i hide behind all my frens now..

*****okok now i cant walk around school normally as i am in"fear" of that nit wit !!!..geex geex!!!..

anyway im off now la told u u would find it interesting!...

sunshines
Nic

//hey sorry could not make it today ya..//
//hello sorry abt tt day k well i called to say sorry so yes..love ya//
//HEY MY LIL SUNFLOWER HAPPY BIRTHDAY SORRY K I WQILL GIVE U UR EARRINGS LA KKK>>LOVE U ALWAYS KEEP(TRYING) TO GROW...*hoot hoot hoot*
//hey my chomps..love u ppl to bites noe we all going through some sort of rough time now but..oh well always there for u ppl k!//
//hey ade and sharon thanks for listening to my crap all the time my best best frens!//

2005-02-07T19:48:00.000+08:00

okok been a while since i decided to blog

was fun last weekend my dear frens came over to stay ya it was jo sam and sharifah sadly tanya went home la haiz haiz...oops sorry jo abt the hard floor but still i hope u guys still come and stay over more la ya but cant beat my grandma's house la hahaha..yupz!..anyway sadly my weekend was occupied with cramps and a whole load of prject work la haiz haiz yes i am busy now days la...oh ya rach and shi qi also came by to help on sat than ks shi qi!!...sadly someone was suppose to come over on sat but din make it la haiz haiz oh well..wad to do...anyway jus been thinking alot now days reminds me of those days la..hahah made some decisions tt i noe would hurt ppl but i made them so tt things would b better for both parties la ya..anyway cant believe i am spending my CYN doing my commerce project redo defective goods man its going to be hell but oh well noe choice hope someone can come la haiz haiz...anyway nothing much to say here today jus real real tired i promise my next entry would be more interesting

LOVE
NIC

//be happy ya!?//
//hey girl noe the clouds have been grey but im still here watching out for u kzzz..promise//
//hey my lil stewart i love u so much haiz we needa hang out more la deh!//
//CHOMPS 3 months and its been good i thank God for u guys!//
//my skinny potato u brigthen my day somehow..geex..breast pain!//

* im still missing u like the storm misses the rain like a warm summers day im missing u always im still breathing u like ur here in my arms like ur not even gone im missing you...*

2005-01-29T21:35:00.000+08:00

wow its been more than a week since i blogged here man..wow sooo many things have been happening like me falling sick for two days in one week cos i had some balance disorder hahah..sad la..but well as u all can see im back in balance la hahah..so yes this week in school there was the 3 day camp like WTF la it was more of a workshop can sat in class listening to God knoes wad while all the other ppl were having fun like sec one's had orientation than sec two were going to i don knoe where than sec threes were off to johor..haiz..we all damn sway!!!

okok so at camp it was boring but since me and tanya sat at the back of the class hahah we told a whole load of jokes mainly dirty ones..heheh...seriouly!!..until we got bored and started on the knock knock ones hahah..but they made us all laugh la haha..okok so than came the second day where we had loads of fun too..haha i saw my dar dar outside school!!!..haha she came down to get something from her "angel" haha..okok shall not be bad la hahah...so sawa her for like five mins but i was not feeling well so was a lil moody la haha!!!...well..

than came day three yes yes finally the last day and we had to learn some funny skills on mountain climbing and its not like im going to climb a mountain la so ya!!!..hahahah..well for one thing i noe how to pitch a tent and absail haha was scared of heigths but had shafiq to help me so nothing was bad hehe!!!...after tt saw someone and went home also so guess the day ended well although i was ignored at first..geex!..

today had some stupid forum thing which was real cool!!..detail will be told in school!!!..

i school system so sucks and i must say its damn sway also..eva since Jlo came in our sch ar got so much of f***ed up shit!..u noe my poor cousin din get netball and like im shocked!!..and when she put guitar the F***ed up school gave her guides can!?!..like no ofence to guides la but..ah!! nvm la!..

okok after tt forum went to concourse to get stuff for commerce project la was doing my part la..was kinda fun also la..hahah sharon was acting like a funny toot haha imagine she din noe how to blow bubble hahah stupid la tt girl!!..okok sharon i say sorry k1!!...later ade papa sent us home and yupz came home and jus chilled..

really hurting inside right now but i guess i cant let it out yet..

Sunshines
Nic

//hey hope last nite was the nite of ur life!!//
//hey was good to see u and i don wanna imagine u with shorter hair..i like u in long hair!!//
//my lil sunflowerhaha i cant stop thinking abt how u jumped and fell on ur own loser man stewart!!//
//CHOMPS..Jo im so proud of u i really am..Seah u ar i think fated not to tell now la but i hope u say soon k!..Sa hold on bro we gotta get thru together..Sam hehe dumpy is always on ur mind ya im happy ur finally trying..You Know Who u ar give her up can!!haha look for J_ _ _ _ _ _..Tanya..haahahwad can i say abt u...NOTHING!?..except i love u!(like real)..eh sharifah i noe its hurting but chomps are here k!..I LOVE THE CHOMPS//
//hey my besties sharon & ade..thanks gor always being there and loving me for me!//
//hot babe i noe u don read this but missed ya..hehe//
//sarah don wory u are going to be my junior!!love ya!//

***recently heard this song again and wanted to share it***

Nelly feat. Tim McGraw

Cause its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I can’t keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad, yeah
Cause it’s on in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I can’t take it yeah I can’t shake it
Nooo

I can’t wait to see you
Want to see if you still got that look in your eyes
That one you had for me before we said our goodbyes
And it’s a shame that we got to spend our time
Being mad about the same things
Over and over again
About the same things
Over and over again
Ohh
But I think she’s leaving
Ooh man she’s leaving
I don’t know what else to do
(I Can’t go on not loving you)

Cause its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I can’t keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad, yeah
Cause its on in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again yeah
And I can’t take it yeah I can’t shake it
Nooo

I remember the day you left
I remember the last breath you took right in front of me
When you said that u would leave
I was too damn stubborn to try to stop you or say anything
But I see clearly now
and this chose I made keep playing in my head
Over and over again

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Playing my head
Over and over again
Ohh
I think she’s leaving
Ooh man she’s leaving
I don’t know what else to do
(I Can’t go on not loving you)

Cause its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I can’t keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad, yeah
Cause its on in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I can’t take it I can’t shake it
Nooo

(Now that I’ve realizes that I’m going down
From all this pain you’ve put me thought
Every time I close my eyes I like it ?
I can’t go on not loving you)

Cause its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I can’t keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad, yeah
Cause its on in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I can’t take it I can’t shake it
Nooo

Cause its all in my head
I think about it over and over again
And I can’t keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad, yeah
Cause its on in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I can’t take it I can’t shake it
Nooo

Over and Over again
Over and Over again
Cause it’s all in my head

2005-01-14T22:51:00.000+08:00

It constanly plays on my mind..

am i a good leader?

do i deserve this?

was it a wrong choice?

haiz i don noe la..today was sec one orientation...

started out fucked up...

ended with 42 memembers...

good..nah..excellent!....

thanks to all hu helped and played...

melissa,madeline,cherrie,shellen,eelynn,janet thanks for playing and practicing last min.

thanks u my committee for all ur help in doing all the work last minute....

thanks Angkulung for ur fullest support we enjoyed working with u..

may than u's today...

Great job council U DID WELL!!!!

okok so it ended up great la..i admite...

well after tt went for dinner la..ya was fun haha me and my lame jokes

helped me feel better la..

than came back for sec one parents nite thank God i was not on duty hahah first time!
i jus had to do a speech for my mum abt the CCE s' yupz..

guess it went well with all the compliments..my head is still the same size..

now at home and tired..jus tired..of alot of stuff..tired to think to eat to work...haiz..

im outta here
NIC
* nothing to say nothing to do nothing to feel..jus stoned in my own space in the corner of my room

RE: Let it slide vs Against all odds

2005-01-10T22:53:00.000+08:00

hmmm..let it slide or against all odds...

amazing how it is..the irony of it all..

one tells u to stay..the other to let go..

so who do u end up listening to?...

Your heart?....

Your mind?....

Your body?....

Or?...Your soul?...

decisions are hard to make...

Its hard not to look back...

and realise how love was strong...

how it over powered pain and sorrow...

how it embraced laughter and excitement...

how it kept two ppl together...

the irony of it all lies in you...

not what u see..feel..hear..smell..or taste

its inside...

how long will u face it...?

should you let it slide?...

oh go against all odds...

think abt it?...

deep in thought
Nic
//give it time let it slide//
//There is still hope in things you do not know//
//NO regrets!//

E.P.I.C

2005-01-09T01:08:00.000+08:00

hahah hey ppl school has been shit ass man..but enjoy seeing ppl la..yupz oh yai got tamil on mon and wed same as my cuz this means no CCA on monday but *toot* it la im still going sometimes la..hahah..

today went out and had loads of fun doin the commerce project!..hahah met the girls at abt 11 la and or dear lisa and jia got up late so they both met ua like damn late la haha but oh well wad the hell we still did our shopping and it was seriously fun fun fun!!haha we went down to art friend to get materials la ya and than went down to ikea and im crazy over furniture i so wanna do up my room can i was so crazy tt i bought four candles hahah and i love them so much haha im going down soon to get more stuff and i give myself till end of jan to do up my room ahahh..cant wait after tt went to church and than begged my parents to let me meet my bro for a concert ya his lec's band la E.P.I.C la..i love their songs but one song caught me..let it slide..so nice and some other song abt nature its a classic man..haha went for dinner with my bro nats and dar la..ya had fun la oh but before tt met dar and ani at bedok and kept ani company till her date la ya hahah was fun spending time together and cracking up lame jokes haha sponsored by "yours truly" hahha..so ya walked from orchard to city hall hahha ya than i tell u k i miss the esplanade like hell hahah...

ya..but i reallu loved today like hell cos i got free poster haha u see they asked questions abt the band and ppl had to answer hahah than i was a crazy girl and ran to answer so i got a poster and two cards haha nice going to be in my room haahahha...yups..anyway im off now la..got home work i have not do hahah

Ciao
Nic
//good luck with R_____//
//hey was fun hanging out with my bro and nats//
//LIfe has many routes i chose a diffrent route that made me happy//

OKOK its back to school goodbye Freedom

2005-01-05T21:25:00.000+08:00

wow third day os school adn im already feeling the heat ...phew..this year is going to be one hell of a year man i can already see everything not falling into place like SYF and School work..haiz haiz..well atleast now i do all my homwork by myself and although i get time to get on the com its only like for reserch work.well heard that maria was coming back but guess wadjus talked to her today and well she decided to stay there ass la tt girl miss her so much than she don wanna come back hahahah...well christmas was a bundle of joy although honestly it was not called christmas..hahaha had a party at chantel's place and it was good la hahah this year i din leave so early so she better be happy ahhahaha..okok so than on thw 29th was sooo fun had a chomps nite hahah was damn damn fun noe hahah rumors were spilt and cleaned up seriously i wanna do it again kkk..hahaha

okok so school lets see BLEAH BLEA BLEAH AND MORE BLEAh well mayb not that bad la i seriously miss the ppl only group i don miss is the discipline team hahaha oh oh i heard that Miss Thanabal is not in the team now and miss masura too..cool hahah but will miss miss Thanabal la hahah lisa i think u understand y hehhehhe..well i guess now im happy with my sitting arrangement la ya sitting with my bro so very the fun hahaha but of course we study la...

can u believe it jus the other day i went back with Mrs yong and Mrs BOo, and we were talking abt GGR hahah and than u noe wad they both thought tt ppl have r/s in the same class hahah now tt is DUMB hahaha..oh my they actually thought tt we date our own classmates hahah yucks don wanna even try can hahaha...

**seriously head over heels not confused and no regret.fear mite be in ur way but its not in mine..differences are many but one at heart..such an amazing thing this is huh? nv guessed it would even start..i don noe if i should say wad my heart feels is true that in my heart ur my secret love too..**

damn tired
Nic

2005-01-05T14:39:00.000+08:00

I DONT CARE WHETHER YOU LIKE IT. JUST WORK WITH IT WILL YOU?

Or find me something that you think works, I'll fix it...

xxxD

New Blogskin

2005-01-04T09:54:00.000+08:00

Hello Nic!

I hope this works out. If you like it, I'll work on it further. What do you think? I'm sorry for the missing tag board and all the links. I have it in my thumbdrive, together with the new layout, BUT... you see, theres a BUT. I lost my 80 bucks thumbdrive. In the mean time I've gotta find something that fits you. This one sorta does. Maybe you won't like it. Anyway, just give me the green light and I'll get it. Green light to continue or green light to stop. Anyways, whatever...

PS, I fixed my blog up as well, I had some time on hand yesterday. Easier to tag

xxxD

Legion Functions..Nice..Boys..SUCK

2004-12-18T22:05:00.000+08:00

haiz..sleepy now

jus got home from outing hahah..after legion function..
today was an early start..slept at like 2 and got up early to meet cyn at 8.30 cos we had to meet mel.w and sharon to get stuff,,hahah was fun fun la..sharon was our mummy hahah..but yes yes i got bullied till my dear glad came along hahah..and yes we have fun carrying FIVE water melons hahah..since cyn is a stick insect heheh she could not carry la..she jus action hahah!!

after that had fun wrapping presents haha for the winners...

later was mass..poor ally and aza haha the ppl jus sang either soooo slow or fast haah sad la..but u noe wad glad sang!! hahha i mus say my bro has a nice voice haha

later we had games..and yes yes the games were good but one think BOYS CAN B SOOO ANNOYING THEY CANT BE CALLED MEN AND DON DESERVE IT!!..hahahah soooo ANNOYING..
but thank God curia officer said games are really good hahah sooo happy..

was damn tired after tt but wth still went out with cyn and glad..went down town and met miss lim and miss teo..haha talked for like wad 20 mins plus and ya instead of watching movie we walked to somerset for coffee then glad split to meet someone and me and cyn went for coffee..haha and i mus say i rather have nice and covered haha nice..ya..hahah..was real fun like wad after ONE MONTH haha..

on the way home told granfather stories..hahah...

anyway today was jus great tiring but great...cant wait for school to start..so i can get more nice and covered stuff hahah...anyway i got 6 POINTS hahah
so happy can i havled my score from 13 to 6 hahah soooo proud noe..hahah i promised God that im going to sooo study so hard i don care..

okok euff of crap im off now ciao
Nic
//thanks for u prayers//
//hey thanks for the encouragement bezfren..//
//hey don b so shcked i got one for EL la hahah anything possible la//
//for eveyone hu prayed thank u..//
//hey bro YENJOY Aussie land//
//Cyn thanks for praying during ur jet lagged period haha..love ya..//

OOPS

2004-12-14T11:57:00.000+08:00

Oops, sorry your blogskin didn't work out. I'll do it -- when I have the time

Meanwhile, just make do with this.

I wonder how your shock was like when you realise your blogger had become a piece of grey background. Turns out it didn't work in YOUR browser, while it worked in mine.

I really DID try to make your blogskin, its just it DIDN'T manage to work out. You can ask Anishia, -points to right hand side- It was a pain really, to make the skin, getting frustrated and looking for the perfect picture.

PS. Anishia was bugging me to make her a skin when she knew I was making one for you.

I know this all is irrelevant especially to all of you out there who are reading her blog now. But I'll be back!

Oops, I'm babbling again

xxx D

haiz...i wonder..im i right..is it now?..what i had..CONFUSION

2004-12-13T13:26:00.000+08:00

hey people...

i cant see my blog at all and well i needa tell d so ya
haiz things were great on my birthday my cuz surpried me by asking adriano and celeste to come for my birthday party..was so fun la..anyway im back in spore now and well
im jus..ok?..i guess..

tired and jus jet lacked...haiz...im confused abt stuff ....best part is i don noe wad
myy past is haunting me ha?..but im happy...survived so long ok...ya...

things are how it should be i guess..u'll find someone better more loving and have better experiences with..im sure...its not rite to b cynical but if its going to make u feel better than ok..

i take full blame of the situation now..

i noe things will nv b the same but oh well we shall see...

time changes everything..even things u nv expect to change....anyway im off now

jus turned16
Nic
//okok u complain no msg so here hello lil girl...//
//hey .....//
//come home soon miss u..//

Unveiled

2004-12-08T00:00:00.000+08:00

Welcome Home NIC!!!

And Happy Birthday, just like I promised.

Love
d.

IN ROME

2004-12-07T01:23:00.000+08:00

hello ppl

now in rome and well its jus great la ya everyone here is real nice and all well once i arrived i went up to assisi in the north and stayed there for abt 4nites and i mus say it was soooooooo nice noe ya actually if given a choice i don wanna go back to spore...today i jus got back to rome and well its not as cold as assisi but its nice oh ya i also went to Pisa and say tt tower and i climbed it and for those of u hu noe my fear guess wad i did it noe hahah jus a lil wobbly but I DID IT ahahahah...anyway guys i miss u all very much especially Rusty,...oh btw thanks chantel and nats for taking care of him for me ya...oh and im not sure but i guess anishia also tagged along..
well anyway i guess i shall save italy for when i get back to singapore...

Ari va der che
Nic

*so near yet so far

Changes...

2004-11-27T13:08:00.000+08:00

hello ppl

hahha sooo happy im off to Rome very very soon haha cant wait to get the stupid hair cut tmr tt my mum promised to get on friday haha..anyway im going to enjoy myself when i go and jus let everything go..yes yes i mite have had some meaningful times this year but lets face it its time to move on and as the saying goes..once bitten twice shy..i noe it happened twice and well having a third is seriously not wad i need..frenz would be better...

anyway i jus have one more thing to get off my chest and im going to do it..its no point hiding anymore..the hurt jus gets more and more..so here it goes..

well ppl been having fun in CCA pass two lessons E.I wrote another song for our second album haha sooo happy so now we have nine more songs to write yay!!..anyway i found a drummer KES!!she is learing the drums now so yupz will get back to her...
anyway im off now will let u noe how the chest thing went i noe its going to suck so ya

ciaoz
Nic
**i will miss everything and i wont forget but its jus time to move on and jus be frenz

My BOo...!!

2004-11-21T19:15:00.000+08:00

hahah..okok don ask why im real happy today la..haha recived an email form someone so ya made me feel better after an all so bleah yesterday..memories..haiz..sad..11..haiz..ok nvm..ppl have to move on..and well i am...trying..anyway ...jus wish that things will be back to normal that u would be here now..haiz feel so lost and sad and oh well jus ...bleah..

ok 10 more days..oh wow!!..but will be in rome before tt.haiz sooo sad

grandpa collasped today and because of tt cant go council farewell haiz plus im recovering and my assholic dad thinks i mite either pass germs or get germs cos my donno wad rate is low haiz..f*** it la anyway nothing much to say since its only been three grooling days..

ciao!!
NIc
//back from malaysia..haha..atleast someone has someone to confide in now//
//hey....wad up girl heard u stop e medication...haiz..stubborn as always//
//hey bros..wad up we still have not gone out together..//
//MY BOO!!! i miss u where eva u are//

Far Far away in a place i call..?!?!

2004-11-19T11:23:00.000+08:00

nine days has flown by jus like that ya..people come people go..haiz..one week no emails...oh well..wad am i to do..

had to bring darling to the doc on wednesday..poor girl is always not taking care of herself and for "goodness" sakes ya act ur age k?!..well actually the doc was a funny experience..*hint hint*..hahah ok nvm...u go ask her if u wanna noe la k!!..haha anyway walked her home cos i wanted to advise her on "TAKING HER MEDICATION!!!!"...HAHAHA...okok..

was so cool after tt..on my way home in the bus i saw my dear ex vice prisident SHAZNI!!! my "goodness" cant believe she is back from bali haha so happy that i saw her gonna pass the pieces to her so she can take part in SYF next year!!..hope to see u soon girl!!

wow cant believe it im off to rome next next monday wow now tts fast..but sadly when i get back its 7 days to results..haiz i have decided to call up rochelle to seek soliace..haiz..

oh ya "TANYA I CAN HEAR U!!!"..sorry la i noe its lame jus needed to do tt

anyway sorry rach i din make it for ur thingy k no hard feelings ya..

happy birthday to rach and eileen and well my dear Melissa and lil Shone...eh shone take care of urself ya i noe u wont be reading this la but i noe ur sis chantel will so ya..tc drink loads of syrup it helps!!

oh yes and not forgetting my couzin sarah..sorry for all my mistakes k i don wan our bond to break k i would nv do anything to break it..or mayb i have indirectly but im going to change wad i have done take care girl and i love you ya!!

saundy!! u owe my nice treat rmbr!!NYDC haha!!

anyway peeps im off now!!
Nic
//take care in M'sia//
//U ar take ur medications k!!//
//stewart!! next time mus take bus together and talk more crap//
//hey bros hope u guys free next week to go out!//
//D thanks so much for the advise last nite..//
//tanya is as ass hahahaha//
//muni,nor and sharifah..selamat hari riya!!//
//Chomps peace out!!//
//sarah i voted for BLUE//
//hey cyn noe ur in portugal now enjoy yourself ya! love you//

This or That

2004-11-10T19:41:00.000+08:00

wow its been ten days..phew the days have been going by real fast ya sooner or later im of to ROME for our families unprepared trip..haha..seriously i think we are going to have fun though..
lotsa events been going on in my life recently..school..family..love..God noes wad other bullshit man..haiz school is real fun yet a big big stress.don noe why but jus seems like it

got a whole load of stuff and proposals to hand in to Miss Wu by the 18th haiz..don wanna be the last CCA to hand up stuff like always man..haiz..

have not seen certain ppl in a while and well since they are kinda busy going out and all don wanna be a bother to them..and anyway i gauge the person is doing well in health now..haiz,...im sorry if im being crude la k..jus tired..

went down to town so many times im sick sick sick of town its jus the word town that even make me wanna puke!!..haiz haiz haiz...wanna go to the night safari again was really damn damn cool man!!..hahahah...

oh btw good news to all i have a new born cousin and his name is Ethan Luc Gerard hahah and im going to love him soooo much but of course i wont shun out my eva dearest Tara Clare..hahaa...jus real happy la he is such an angel!!

oh watched the doll master today and my my wad a stupid show!!...to imagine!!..haahaha..but i had good company ya so nothing else mattered la!...except being real dumb and closing my eyes now i think i got eye problem!!..hahah

anyway im off now i noe this entry sucks la so nvm

Sunshines
Nic

//im not being bhb la but wad u wrote in ur blog the last part is it mine?//
//hey..been a while..hope ur ok?...im still not sure...i miss u though..but..haiz..)*(#!)//
//NIK!!!!! i miss u like fuck man!!!//
//hey bros how u doing!...guess life is good huh?..//
//cyn u pinch me till got sour plums now!!....//
//d i nv see u sooooooooooo long really miss u..tell clara i miss her pls//

*Her smile is Like a drug to my soul...A drug i cant refuse...4064770803837907464530329*

4/3 I believe in you and will always believe in you

2004-11-01T10:44:00.000+08:00

hey ho!!

everyone sorry for the late entry cos u see my house has been having a short circuit every time..anyway sec 4/3 im so proud that u got first haha i noe we all din believe that we could make it and were saying that jus getting in to the top three would have been ok and all..but hey hey!! we made it and thanks for all ur support and if it was not for u guys i weould not have received the best performer award!!..i am sooo glad i won it and i dedicate the award to all of u and my parents for being my support..i noe we are all not that academically stable and all but atleast we have a sense of character in us.

for all the schoolmates and very close frens that had supported us through our two performances we really really wanna thank u guys so much because its only through good and supportive fans that we could make it so far and its really amazing how u make us feel so loved..honestly we have nv stopped loving to perform and i don thing we will eva!!

for my real real close frens like glad nik ally aza cyn and for now laura and all u other ppl hu has been there for very long and was screaming at the top of your voices thanks!! hahah well tts wad frens are for.

oh and thanks Darling and ani for the encouraging msg in the morning..4/3 says THANKS!!

my parents thanks for both making it there even though mum i noe u had to leave half way but first time dad u were there all the way!! I LOVE U!!

my bro nic for being soooo very supportive of me in wad eva i did!!!

my cuz sarah..thanks so much for being there for me and supporting me even though i aint that much of a blue fan.

OH OH and my SAUNDY!!...hahah thanks thanks thanks for all the prayers u did for my class!! I LOVE U!!!!hahah

and i forgot the most important person GOD!! thanks!!!

//oh my now that was one long thank you list for my creative com..phew!!//

SUNSHINES
NIC

"life has not been on the brightess of days but i'm not alone.."

If love is F***ed Up I'd call it Shit!!!!

2004-10-21T19:11:00.000+08:00

hey hey

soooo happy today and yesterday!!..i rocked climbed and was soooo fun but SCARY coz im like scared of heights..hahah but was ok la..i got a license to CLIMB now hahaha..fun fun ya and guess wad im the firat person who rock climbed blind folded hehehe...so so cool k but funny la i think being blind folded is so much better than not..cos u cant see anything la..haha..ya

oh got a surprise coming up..hope it happens!

you think you've got it than you've lost it

NIC
*put your head on my shoulder..hold me in ur arms baby..nv let me go mayb..u and i will fall in love..put ur lips next to mine dear..than i forgot the words*

FREE YOU MIND..

2004-10-12T21:23:00.000+08:00

hey hey everyone wad up!!!

its over over!!!..ya..had loads of fun on monday came home changed went out to met my darling...ya than went down orchard for lunch and was kinda fun la had pigeons flying all over my food ya was scary la..coz they were lik shitting all over the place ya hahah
than went for movie.."white chicks"/..hahahah was like sooo funny according to tanya Marcus reminded her of me and guess wad i think marcus is cute so indirectly i think im cute heheheheh....
well anyway after tt went to take neo prints was like so funny i think we almost broke the machine man hahah..ya anywya wen oour seprate ways
i went down to city hall to chill at the beach with my darling..
left at abt like 8 cos i had to like rush home

by the way thanks for the cab k i will pay back ya

*missing evrything can hurt so much but with no choice i try to live again*

Nic

in and out of life

2004-10-08T21:57:00.000+08:00

busy busy week N's all over the place papers here and there cant seem to get my life organised one point in time u think its all rite the next thing u noe its all jumbled up and ur runnign in circles wondering wad the Fuck is going on sorry abt the language..everything is falling apart in my life and i cant seem to hold it down..move on..stay here..try again..afraid of hurting..be on the right track..haiz well i guess i will nv be able to draw my life out..monday is the last paper and i really wanna do well jus want to make my parents happy since i cant seem to make an one else happy..and sometimes i wonder y im such a failure..haiz guess in my whole fam im kinda the stupid one ya well mayb besides my cute dad..life has no more meaning..i agree with u Nats..guess i should jus fade away from reality and soak myself in dreams and bull shit coz mayb tts going to get me everywhere...i wanna run but guess i cannt the lactic acid is kinda too much and i cant seem to accelerate myself enough..haiz sorry abt the bio and phy crap..

:I have been asking u to show me the light..where are u..i knoe ur there watching my every move,speak to me and be with me thru all this crap tt im facing now i need someone and no one is there only u will be there only u noe the pain u mite not like the lifestyle i live but u will always love me a man slow to angry and rich in mercy yet i will not test thee..i love u so much:

Rain Clouds
Nic
//ALL doing the exams do ur best//
*is this it or am i still dreaming for dreams?*

someone healed my heart...(all u need is love)

2004-09-28T17:49:00.000+08:00

last nite i came home was tired sick and jus felt lik dying..haiz..turned on my com to c if anyone was online and check my frenster and all that sort of shit when i came across someone's blog..haiz tot it was a really sweet..i think tt the person really loves and misses whoever she was talking abt..i myself felt so touched by it my eyes were watery imagine me k me!!..haiz..anyway been muggin but watched the guru last nite on cable and i learnt one thing.."move to the beat of ur heart"..sadly wad my heart wants is not coming true..haiz haiz..anyway..schooled finised at1.45 was suppose to meet nik to go home..sorry nik!!...was busy la..haiz...today was a good day..felt a mixture of feelings..haiz..was jus great..only thing tt hurt was the lost..rite now nothing else matters but the lost..i know i'm still in love and i knoe its mutual..haiz than again i nv noe...anyway..jus stopped by to say hello!..

today nor pinched my *ahem* and was fucking pain was damn pissed with her but than decided to forgive her la since she is always like tt la so Nor i forgive u k jus don go over the limit next time ya love ya!!

hey ade u ar nv play with me today!!!..sad sad man...oh ya i forgot yesterday went to Jo house and was like so fun we all were like emo man!!,,was like almost crying man haha but it helped to get things off our mind la..jus so nice eh Jo next time we go again k..its nice to know tt u got ur frens...

tts all for now
Nic
//hey sorry abt yesterday//
//hey hey sum1 who can tell u tt they care and still love you now matter wad..and to have sum1 to flash a couple of cards to to show wad u feel..since words cant measure them...all u need is love..//
//hey nik sorry i din go home with today k..love ya.//
//hey bros be strong in ur decisions k!!!//
//DANG my best frens!//

Back at one..

2004-09-24T17:37:00.000+08:00

itseen a rough week eva since last friday..been trying to catch up on my life but i cant..haiz..studying and studying..i suddenly love to study so much till it scares me sometimes..guess thats the only way to get my mind off stuff..wow..its been a week and i cant seem to get back on track who would have known it would be like this ya..well u could say i knew it was coming any day anyhow..but u noe i guess i was wrong..i was very very wrong...i was more than wrong..i never ended up in such a bad state before..y was i so F***in stupid to suggest such a thing..haiz jus wanted [S.F] to be happy..wad was i to do rite..haiz...now im hurting worse than eva and wad else can i do but nothing...i've nv cried so much...over wad i also don noe...looked lik crap today in school...haiz..did more studying today and than had prata with the gang and got muni a lil cake...HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHARON AND MUNI AND MY LIL TARA!!!!!!...wow..16,16 and 2 respectivly..haiz i still cant watch NC16 movies...oh went for dodgeball on tuesday..it was the best time eva in my life eva since i went to the esplanade....movie was great company was even better..chill at coffee bean talked abt everything but wad was important...haiz..wads wrong with this year..it was beautiful than fucked up...
"all alone in my solitde wad am i to do..wondering if this is wad we were made to believe in..are we made for eachother..guess we will nv noe.."

STARCROSSED LIK SAM
Nic
//thanks...//
//wad more is there to say to you..i've tried to explain myself..wad eva happened tt day was.........haiz...nvm it don matter..//
//hey nik thanks for jus being there in the canteen today//
//hey bros study hard N's are a week away...bro glad come back soon we miss u!!..haha//
//To all hu were there..lisa,sam,tanya,jo,sharon,fel,rachi,linette,muni,deb,mel,nor,eileen,sharifah,Ade,Ally,Nik,glad till u went OBS thank you all so much for being there for me when i had no one..//

The Road Im on...

2004-09-18T22:40:00.000+08:00

THE FALL:
the road im on is not the best road
its rough hard jaggard and once u fall hard
you get a large wound
and you noe something
the wound can heal
it may take a long time
a day a month a year
but even though its healed
the scar will always be there
and then everytime u look at the scar
it reminds u of that same road
which u nv wanna walk on again
but somehow u end up on a similar road
not the same
yet causes the same hurt
pain and leaves another visiable scar
and u keep staying on the same road
but on a diffrent avenue all the time
THE WOUND:
you try to make the pain go away
but everytime u try it hurts more and more
you see the blood gush out
its rich colour of red scares you
and u wished it would stop bleeding
because the pain reminds u
of all the times that you have fallen
not even medication
can take away the pain u felt when u fell
medication only tries to heal it faster
but pain will always be there
THE HEALING:
the healing is not easy
if its a slight fall
it would be hard but the medication would help
if it was deep and pain everytime u move
than not even the medication can speed the process
your only support are the people who see you
and ask if you need help
and when they help you
you feel strong again
and you fight for the will to strive
but yet even during healing
the fall and the wound will always be visible in your mind
THE SCAR:
Its healed
you dont feel the pain physically
but you feel it mentally
when you sleep
you think abt your fall the wound u recieved
and how it took so long for it to heal
you wished you were more careful
when your awake
you see it when u stand in front of the mirror
the same thoughts keep racing through your mind
the pain comes back into your mind over again
your lost and confused
and tt scar leaves a heavy inpact in your life

i jus fell again and no one is there my life is screwed up again
NIC
*mugging for the N level*

Am I too Lost In You?..Or am i hanging By a Moment?

2004-09-14T23:40:00.000+08:00

Dear Nic.
do you noe wad u want in life? of are u jus making guesses all the time..is this right or is that wrong?..well i dont think your vinidicated as much as u want to be..its not going to happen anytime soon...so well if i were the real you i would open my eyes and analyse wad i can gain from now on and if i realise i lose out in a friendship well than try to get it back if u cant that well jus too bad and if love is slowly leaving u and u feel so insecure well than try to spice things up and feel secure if you cant than i think u can fall into ur depression line..if you think ur not working hard enuff than study and mugg and dont waste time..if you cant well than jus dig ur grave and die..Nic i think ur not confused anymore although mayb jus a lil..you noe wad u want in a friendship and tts trust you noe wad u want in love and tts honesty and you noe wad u want in education and tts a high paying job..haha..oh well its not wrong to dream..well nic all the best to your mugging days..
*******************************************************************************
PART ONE???
You look into my eyesI go out of my mindI can't see anythingCos this love's got me blindI can't help myselfI can't break the spellI can't even tryI'm in over my headYou got under skinI got no strength at allIn the state that I'm inAnd my knees are weakAnd my mouth can't speakFell too far this time Baby, I'm too lost in youCaught in youLost in everything about youSo deep, I can't sleepI can't thinkI just think about the things that you do I'm too lost in you oohWell you whispered to meAnd I shiver insideYou undo me and move meIn ways undefinedAnd you're all I seeAnd you're all I needHelp me baby Help me baby Cos I'm slipping awayLike the sand to the tideFalling into your armsFalling into your eyesIf you get too nearI might disappear
might lose my mind Baby, I'm too lost in youCaught in youLost in everything about youSo deep, I can't sleepI can't thinkI just think about the things that you do I'm too lost in you I'm going in crazy in love for you babyI'm going down like a stone in the seaYeah, no one can mess with meOooh, my babyOooh, baby, baby
**********************************************************************************
PART TWO??
Desperate for changingStarving for truthI'm closer to where I startedI'm chasing after youI'm falling even more in love with youLetting go of all I've held on toI'm standing here until you make me moveI'm hanging by a moment here with youForgetting all I'm lackingCompletely incompleteI'll take your invitationYou take all of me nowI'm falling even more in love with youLetting go of all I've held on toI'm standing here until you make me moveI'm hanging by a moment here with youI'm living for the only thing I knowI'm running and I question where to goAnd I don't know what I'm tapping intoJust hanging by a moment here with you
**********************************************************************************
Love Always
Your Left Brain

//I think nic is happy tt you are friends//
//honestly nic is not sure wad to write here....i cant figure tt side of her yet..expect tt she loves u alot..//
//nic thinks your short ..don tell her i told u//
//hey nic's bros wads up?!..//
//Nic now go choose which song represents u...?//

I've got YOU..don wanna lose tt

2004-09-11T22:09:00.000+08:00

wow kinda happy tt my local N's papers are don now haha..jus kinda free but still mugging like f*** at home la trying to study..haha..but as we all noe there has been loads of stuff on my mind..well tried putting it behind me by erasing those Blue msgs in my phone..like wad they say the wound mite have healed but the scar is still there..im slowly trying to accept certain facts tt i noe hurt my inside..although its not working i think the person would be happier if i din show my "jealous" side haha..oh wel..everyday im scared of losing but wad to do rite..jus got to sit back and try to chill..i noe it would only hurt YOU to hurt me and plus i think im getting my own medicine which totally sucks haiz haiz..
Anyway was really really really!!! happy today coz i meet someone haha..its been two weeks since we met and i mean lik really met and was jus good seeing YOU haiz..although i got a lil freaked at times la..haha atleast YOU were there to make sure i was ok..really sweet of YOU..haha..you noe wad i'm lucky to have You..haha..
anyway yesterday i went chilling at the airport with lisa jo tanya eileen sharifah while dar and d came along later haha was so full of shit how we talked abt bombs to boobs haha..okok ppl must come over for our CHICAGO date yups!!..haiz you noe its jus so good hanging out and chilling with your frens haiz haiz..
oh mums coming home tmr looks like life is going to be lik hell from now but oh well wad to do..was fun not having her at home for a month but i mus say i did miss her la haha..hope she don start controlling me again haha..
anyway i got to go now!!

white clouds!
NIC
//haiz i nv knew i was your confidante but im sorry things happened this way la..mayb its jus meant to be..//
//hey hey your my silver lining on my huge dark cloud..love ya!..)*!!)//
//nik nik where are u ar?!!..//
//hey bros wads up in life man?!..//
//hey d was great hanging out and seeing you on friday..missing u//
//CHOMCHOM!!!//

Everybody Hurtz!

2004-09-03T18:46:00.000+08:00

wad if one day your lying on your couch and realised that the person you love more than life is saying good bye..haiz..well..no one has a perfect relationship..

Its been a long time since i felt hurt creep into my veins and one things for sure its so painful not even a shoot could kill it..its when your in a complicated world full of "how?".."why?".."wad did i do?"..it makes ur feelings uncertain because you are afraid of being hurt again and again..

mayb its not a crush and mayb im in the way and should step out since its hurting you so much to see me hurt..oh well i cant afford to lose you now..but if i do than i need to realise tt..dont be with me coz you don want me to hurt be with me cos you still love me..

there are only a few people that can understand the pain and confusion that is blazing into my head..one moment you give up the next you never want to leave me?..i noe im on the losing end and i cant do anything but to continue to love you more and more each day..as wad u said"i cant believe how u can be so understanding and still love me so much?..?"i myself cant believe i have become like tt i don noe why but im happy tt u see me in tt light and wad ever happens i guess i'll be there..
[*one day when you get up and realised im gone tell youself its a lie coz i've been there all along]

Snow flakes
Nic
//hey was good seeing you and d today btw i look cute in those pics//
//nik my sunflower love you//
//*//
//hey bros wads up stay calm and cool ya N's coming ade and sa mus study kk//
//hey D miss u sooo much so good to lik c u man!!..although i still feel short//

*****How much longer will it take to cure thisJust to cure it cause I can't ignore it if it's love (love) Makes me wanna turn around and face me but I don't know nothing 'bout love*****

Losing a Bestfriend..noe wad it feels lik i do..feeling complicated

2004-08-30T18:37:00.000+08:00

we have been friends for so long
but im scared we're losing it
i miss your friendship all the time
you still are my buddy,friend,bestie and brother
i don understand how u dont realise it
we use to share everything
stories,experiences,dreams,fantasies
now we share simple smiles and small talks
its not alrite for me to pretend im ok
coz im not,i feel as if i've lost a best friend
someone who knew me better than anyone
someone i could confide in and still can
someone who looked out for me
someone who was jus always there
i know your going thru many thoughts and mayb
im forgotten now
but i don noe abt you but it hurts alot
it hurts like hell to feel like you
lost a bestfriend when you never had an argument
haiz..i don noe wad to do than tell u i miss your friendship Bro
miss my only true friend..
******************************************************************************
wow its been foreva since i blogged...i noe i said i would update but the prelims were around and i had to do my lil revision..well the papers were ok but i don think i did well enuff this prelims and so if i dont buck up im a gonner..shits..only english maths and science was ok..well hello ITE..haiz..wad happens when u feel its over but u dont even noe y than u wonder..haiz.well i guess sometimes ppl jus need their own space to figure things out and mayb i jus need to keep my distance..jus wanna be by myself for the next few days mayb its good for me to stay away..dont wanna confuse anybody and make things worse..don wanna feel this way coz my N's are next week...
Kinda happy although not so..managed to chill at starbucks our new hang out haha..plan to study there from now on for the N's wanna do well..was fun chilling with CLLS ya..cant wait for tmr chilli crab date can talk abt all my shit problems..haiz..anyway i think i should go now i jus wanna be alone...(i jus wanna fade away to the shivers of cold and where the warmth of the sun cant reach me where nothing lives but the breath of the cold winter winds,the heat of the sun has left my heart and soul and wont be back till summer comes around...i'm full of cold,hate and solitiude)...

hiding behind dark clouds,
NIC
//haiz haiz haiz.....//
//??...you live in a world full of confusions i live in a world figuring out those confusions i still want !)//
//sorry nik abt the small girl thing la haiz..miss ya my sunflower..//
//hey bros..we really gotta go catch up one of these days,,..//
//hey D i suck with blogs!!..//
//hey CLLS chilli crab tmr ya!!//
[WHERE ARE YOU WHEN IM LOST YOU"VE LEFT ME..again]

8 sounds nice...yeah it does

2004-08-20T20:22:00.000+08:00

wow today such a nice and good day..had good fun in school drawing checks all the time its like i have check fever now days..haha im not the only one in class with check fever though..hahah well i must say checks mak me happy..okok enuff abt checks ya..finished tamil class early today but ended up going home late coz i went to meet [!)] ya..was really happt to see the person..haha really missed the person..gave [!)] the card and prayed tt it would b appreciated and it was..haha made[!)]'s heart melt hahah..very happy la..its been long and hard and nothing comes easy ya so appreciate wad u have now coz u wont noe till its gone..

anyway had this jazz band today in school and it was like so seductive hahah..everyone was"touching" eachother all over hahah..was really funny la..
manythings have been happening these past few days but i guess wads on my mind id the N level exams!!!...haiz jus hope i make it la..

anyway tts all la will brb with more next week haha

sunshines
nic
//we lost touch but i hope ur still fine//
//its been(*) mhs and im happy to have you..thank u..love ya lots lots lots..hehe)*!!)!!!//
//hey small girl missing u alot now haha nv see u soo long and btw wads ur label ar?..hehe//
//hey bros wads up..hope ur r/s are going strong ya..and bro ade if u got anything u wanna tok abt u can always tok to me k..//
//hey cuz thanks 4 coming over to my place//
//hey sarah i will go c ur blog if i rmbr haha//
//thanks d for this blog btw how are u??//
//hey CLLS how is the going..thanks for all the help ya//

I'm done..Its true..Vindicated

2004-08-02T22:05:00.000+08:00

you noe wad..if it makes u happy..fine i said wadeva u said i said..ok?..but i'm sick and tired of having u say stuff and twisting stuff around..i don understand how i could say something tt din even happen?..if u dont believe me ask chantel..i tell her everything..

go ask her wad i said if u said i said tt..i'm sorry but im done with this stuff..and i would believe tt you wont give a damn but im jus saying wad i feel..me and my bro want this matter to rest so i guess tts it..we stop here..and i jus said we should meet..not "lets meet"..its diff...wadeva la..jus believe wad u want to..and if u think im at fault..mayb i am..but i wont say im sorry cos im not..im not sorry for knowing you ..im not sorry for loving you..im not sorry for missing u...and im not sorry for who you are...coz its u..07
**************************************************************************************
sorry abt tt ppl jus needed to end some stuff tt had started..

today was a real sad day..the news of that wonderful and loving man was out..he had gone to the creator and was next to him showering his blessings on us..its amazing how one moment tt person tt means the world can be around and suddenly is lost..not tt i was close to the man but well we know which group..but i remeber one thing he told me"your a prefect and carry tt badge with honour"...i was only sec three and jus was promoted so u could imagine how terrified i was..

now tt he is a gone the school would nv be the same again..the figure of discipline,courage and self-respect has faded..those who dont know him well wont understand the impact he has made in the lives of many..but yes we will remeber him as our very own true MR QUAH...
**********************************************************************************
after hearing that sad news at school..i call home to realise that my mum is in the hospital for God knows wad reason all i could do was try to remain calm and to pretend i din really care..but i was hurting inside i din noe wad was going on until my dad said things would be fine..haiz im alone and scared but thank God i have YOU to be there for me and i have a great bunch of friends standing by me...

NIC
//thanks you for respecting my tots//
//hey thanks for the help and support..)*!!)//
//hey thanks for being here for me..no matter wad yeah..shorty//
//hey bros..hope things are going well for you guys..bro glad take it easy yeah//
//4/3 thank u for jus being my help and support//

VINDICATED?!?>>MY ASS!!!!

2004-07-30T21:53:00.000+08:00

sorry ppl noe i have not been blogging and am really sorry abt it ya..jus have been busy studying or jus lazy ya..haha

anyway alot of crap and fucked up stuff has been happening to me lately..firstly some ass invites me to her house and so we end up talking abt stuff and guess wad somehow according to her i said something tt din even happen and than God noes wad she told someone hu told another someone ahow told another someone!!..fucked it la mind ur own business and stay off KPO!!!..i swear man this is not the fucking fisrt time this shit has been happening u noe!!...wad the hell can i soooo agree tt sometimes a lepord can never!!! change its spots..haiz haizs sometimes u wonder wad sort of bullshit friends u end up with...

not only was tt girl a prob buit my mum as well..i swear my mum nowdays has an attitude prob u noe!!(although she was nice enuff to let me go for alison's party cos my dad made her say yes)...yesterday i was feeling so fucked up abt wad i had found out and jus had no mood to go out and eat with her so i asked her to help me buy back my dinner and she kicked up a bloody fuss like a small kid!!...wad the hell come on la such an attention seeker can!..than she was lik "i asked u to call me back when u are outta the shower u only call me back now?"..than i was lik but i am really jus outta the shower" than she was lik"u jus don wanna eat with me rite tts y u called so late"..lik sooooo childish omg i was on the verge of crying if it was not for my day!!..not only tt i cant stand ppl hu dont admite their faults well guess wad those ppl happen to b my "friends"!!..amazing ya..than today in school was damn pissed off half the time with everything a round me(sorry sharon i snapped at u during recess!)..and mrs yong was soooo annoying i swear she is a damn fucked up racist bitch!!..haiz haiz..don noe wad to do la she go and pick on ee lynn and muni for nothing!!..if its not them its me!!..argh!!!!!..can life be more better a not..honestly if its not for some of my friends i would b a goner siah..

haiz don wanna feel like this but guess i jus do everytime...y now not before..

vindicated?..nah
NIC

//i have nothing left to say to u i don wanna have anything to do with u//
//hey been missing u lately have not seen u..don worry abt ur mum k things will be fine//
//hey smelly jenny!!!..hahah..oh sorry i mean shorty!!(i love tanya man.i mean troy)//
//hey bros congrads on ur annis yeah and bro lisa im all here 4 u k.//
//hey muni...(mikel)..wads up my niger!!//
//hey sharon sorry yeah?!..//
//thanks ade for asking ur dad abt tmr!//

Outta this life and on to the next...hmmm

2004-07-13T21:03:00.000+08:00

wad have i don wrong in life to deserve some of the crap that im receving now...its so horrible how ppl can be so close one day and realise that they cant stand that person the next yet they keep glancing back and wanting more..haiz haiz..wad am i talking abt okok..my mind is not with me its all over the place jus last nite i asked HER the most stupid question..wad the hell..and than i got uncomfortable abt it..than guess wad i blamed the whole world for wad had happened its amazing how u feel that u carry the world on ur shoulders when the world does not give a F*** abt you..guess ur "suppose" to live life to the fullest but kiss my ass coz everytime i look around all i see is..hate..shit..crap..and bullshit..and haiz..wadeva la..ok i don even noe why i feel sooo F***ing bleah rite now!!..but as my title says i jus wanna get "outta this life and on to the next" this way i would feel so much more better no worries nothing..nothing at all..

sitting on that F***ing rain cloud
NIC
//hey happy birthday in advance angel!!//
//hey hey hey...don worry abt me..will b fine..as always..//
//looks like our communication system jus broke//
//hey bros looks like we are all in our own worlds facing our ow lil probs..//
//to all the people who noe wad im going thru..I LOVE U GUYS!//

over and out

2004-07-08T23:01:00.000+08:00

its hard
noone said it was easy
its called life
its a game
noone said it was easy
its called strategy
its frastrating
noone said it was easy
its called education
its loyalty
noone said it was easy
its called friendship
its patience
noone said it was easy
its called growing up
....................
its Hard,its a game,its frastrating,its loyalty,its patience
noone said it was easy,
its called LOVE...
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
makes you wonder wad love has done for you rite?..its got u hurt its got u to feel pain it breaks r dreams and blinds ur eyes into seeing reality...than again love is not hard because you care and want the person so much..love is not a game because peoples feelings are at stake..love is not frastrating bcoz its filled with passion..love is not all abt being loyal but being loyal to ur feelings as well as the other..but is Love is patient..and that is why some people wont mind waiting a life time to feel love because sometimes the love you receive mite not be the love that you are looking for.."love will never be faith turned into stone"

sunshine
Nic

i've tried so hard and got so far in the end it doesn't even matter

2004-06-28T19:19:00.000+08:00

yo!..wads up ppls!..hey hey..haha..these pass few days have been stressed with loads of CCA and Previews..and hhaa..LINKIN PARK LIVE IN SINGAPORE!!!..woah!!..must say it was an awesome concert guys..AWESOME..haha..and since my cousin's dad was the director of Lushington i got to meet the guys..OMG jo han is FAt..oops!?..haha..but chester is damn damn cute wahaha..but nothing can beat seeing my Brad and Rob hahha..love both of them sooo much and was real happy to meet them..although i am jealous tt my bro got their signatures on his F***ing guitar!!..argh..haha..but nvm seeing them and taking pics was good enuff..we were soo front tt we could see every thing man!!..LP ROCKS!!..haha

then there was the preview our school is soo shit..haiz the whole school gets to see the performances and we dont..so sad sad can..haiz...nvm la..wad to do..btw i tot the food was good la..was to hungry to be fussy except for the jelly according to some it tasted like heaven..to the rest it was"heaven:s"..hahha..but i din really care jus ate the soup..oops?..jelly..yeah..was kinda tired la going in and out of the room la..haiz..was boring la..after preview met my darling for dinner la..ahaha..stupid bum does not noe how to eat ice cream..(*btw dance was very nice-winks-)..yeah then was like punching her the whole way home hhaha..coz i saw(fake) punch buggys heheh...

then today was the first day of school don noe why but i din have trouble waking up in the morning..hhaha..msged someone then set off to school..haiz the day seemed to pass soo fast..scared siah N levels very near now ahhhhh...u noe today ms julianna was soo mean can..haiz haiz..long story..today i realised how much i missed all my friends inn school hahha..had CCA and was like slacking the whole time can haha..we sorta bullied mr Shi poor guy..then went home with mel who got lost at the bottom of the deck so ended up going home with the two bums AZA and CYNTHIA..(had to b MD ppl)....haha..anishia is sooo gonna kill me for tt..anyways tt was basically it lah..

P.S chilled at the four seasons hotel was AWESOME!!..btw ppl LINKIN PARK STAYED THERE

Sunshines
Nic

//hey kid hope ur feeling better?..//
//haha enjoyed going out with u on sat hahha..i like ppls neacks..*winks winks*//
//hey nik where have u been..-looks up and down-..//
//hey bro glad..congrads!..bro sa..congrads..bro ade..haha..i have no comments haha//
//hey muni tutorial same time same place ah!//

"there comes a time when you realised how far you have come and you jus dont wanna go back..you jus wanna move forward but yet there are so many obstacles in front of you blocking your way..sometimes its your past holding you back..sometimes is your present fixing time on you so that you wont be able to move forward to your future..then you wonder..was i meant to be who i am or was i meant to be someone else..sometimes its the people around you tt help you figure tt out but then a gain sometimes you find them gone and tt your lost in your own dream jus sitting there and playing along and waiting,waiting slowly to get hurt...."

i think i need a holiday

2004-06-21T00:22:00.001+08:00

haiz been fully worked out this whole week with school stuff and all all this shit cos of the Arts Alive that probably only miss Wu is excited abt haha..well my body is aching all over cos i fell in the PFA office the other day..OMG was like sooooo embarrasing can!!..haiz haiz..but nvm lah..(although i kinda spoiled their door!!)..haha..i am sooo scared that miss Wu will not be happy with my ensemble and i am gonna b sooo embarrased when they perform you noe why cos Mr gaspar will be their and..haiz..nvm..jus having alot of things on my mind!..haiz..i hate the feeling of trusting someone and reading something and not trusting them even though u always trust them..but i don admite that i am perfect cos i am not..anyway shall not blabber away abt stuff lah..haiz..still have not gotten sharon's spects fixed..haiz kinda like said tt i would be doing it really soon for that girl...sorry ar!!...okok shall update tmr nite k!!!...

Nic

//GOOD LUCK TMR FOR SCHOOL!!!!//
//GOOD LUCK TMR FOR SCHOOL IF UR BORED THIN OF ME ...THEN LAUGH!!..LUV YA..//
//whey!!!..nvm see u for soooo damn long man mus!!!!! catch up!!//
//hey jillian i miss you sooo damn much!!//
//yes claire will not leave testi's like tt for you!!...heheh//
//hey bros hope u guys are all doing well..heheh!!!//
//hey muni i love you!!//
//GOOD LUCK TMR FOR SCHOOL D!!!!//

it's been forever and it smells like teen spirit!

2004-06-13T23:04:00.000+08:00

hello my lovers out there its been 14 hard days and i noe you have been missing me hahah..well looks like things are getting back on track except for my paranoid mum hu is still at it for those of you who know wad i am talking abt..recently i have discoverd something called hard rock that really rocks..why was'nt i informed tt nrvana cooks up great tasting songs..haha..okok..sorry i jus feel lose and low now tt things are settled well not eerything la but somethings..yeah..

anyway nothing much has been happening besides my parents being outta town and i was creating havoc evrywhere..hhaha..din do anything much besides cutting my hair and getting new spects coz my dear aza wee stepped on them haiz..haha but now they are blue haha sooo cool..well now i am kinda scared coz my hair spikes up but i guess and hope tt it grows by tmr!hahah..but nvm lah..hahha i don think its tt short i din cut the back jus the top lah..anyway will kept u informed if anything new happens la..

"to all my friends in the CLLS group thanks a million for your support when i needed you guys ..you guys really rock my world hahah..love all of u.."

sunshines
Nic
//heard abt the guy and the card and the rose..not bad yeah!!//
//hey missing u alot yeah!!..haha//
//u cant gets last minute dates girl haha//
//i think i am falling for millions!!//
//hey bros..heard all your good news besides bro ade who is sick..praying for u guys!!..peace//

it's not as easy as you think

2004-06-01T12:41:00.000+08:00

i am really honestly confused abt wad i wanna do rite now..my results from the subjects tt i took was not the best of marks and i'm jus afraid of being distracted i'm scared tt if i don concentrate i would have to b in ITE no offence to those in it lah..but well i want a time off things but some ppl think tt if u time off stuff then you would lose it??..is it true?..i don think so..i mean its jus tt your respecting everyone and giving time and space..alot of thins have been happening between friends and family and some are getting attached and some are breaking and some are jus missing other ppl i don know lah but honestly i wanna do wads rite..haiz..wad i write today mite be changed in my mind tmr so i really don noe but for now i wanna concentrate on my Ns and take time off..i hope all of you out there would understand and not hold anything against me k..rite now i really really need your support in helping me...this whole year has been crap and even miss lim says that i have been distracted in class and i noe why..haha..but thanks God she said tt i "buckedd-up"..in term two..haha so my dad was kinda happy abt tt lah..anyway..i wanna do well and do my o's..pls understand me..

Reluctant
Nic
//sorry for all tt ur going through k?..//
//i still feel bad abt u not going out with her..//
//hey we needa tok..if u gauge..//
//hey congrads to all my bros for "EVERYTHING"..hahahaa!!...//
//sorry d abt jus now but i said wad i felt//

2004-05-25T17:44:00.000+08:00

hey ppl sorry but i think that this song really jus explains wad is going on in my mind..i don wanna do anything wrong or hurt ppl?..yupz so to those i hurt i'll make things rite..soon..haha..and for those tt don know tt i'm hurting u i'm sorry i'll make things rite but not now..yeah..thats the reason why i love this song..my good fren ani and my jie are back from NZ haha i'm wanna go back to NZ and see all my sheep!!!..okok lame lame nic..

Sunshines
Nic
//hey good tt ur back//
//GWSMD>>>LUA>>>go figure tt out//
//LOVE MY LIL NIK..hahaha..//
//PB jillan..nv see u 4 soo long..I MISS U//
//to all my bros in the "club"..i'll support ur decisions//
//hey d i want my carrot cake..//
//MUNI MUNI i wanna talk to u in class!!!!..GRAPES AND WINE!!//
//WORK HARD SEC4/3IANS!!..I DON WANNA GO ITE//

Someday Lyrics
Artist: Nickelback
Album: The Long Road

How the hell did we wind up like this
Why weren't we able
To see the signs that we missed
And try to turn the tables

I wish you'd unclench your fists
And unpack your suitcase
Lately there's been too much of this
Dont think its too late

Nothin's wrong
just as long as
you know that someday I will

Someday, somehow
gonna make it allright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
Someday, somehow
gonna make it allright but not right now
I know you're wondering when

Well i hoped that since we're here anyway
We could end up saying
Things we've always needed to say
So we could end up stringing
Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Lets rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a hollywood horror

Nothin's wrong
just as long as
you know that someday I will

Someday, somehow
gonna make it allright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
Someday, somehow
gonna make it allright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)

[Solo]

How the hell did we wind up like this
Why weren't we able
To see the signs that we missed
And try to turn the tables
Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Lets rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a hollywood horror

Nothin's wrong
just as long as
you know that someday I will

Someday, somehow
gonna make it allright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
Someday, somehow
gonna make it allright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
I know you're wondering when

2004-05-17T19:54:00.001+08:00

hey!

school was really good today besides some other stuff lah..missed everyone so much..haha..had a big hug from jo,fel,sam and muni..yupz!..was really glad tt i can smell the school..class was ok lah..only thing is tt miss lim said to prepare our parents for the worset..seems that my class din pretty well at all..english is sad case..geog sad case..miss julianna said SS was a sad case so yeah guess tts bad man!..haiz..i feel guilty for not doing my papers now!..poor ppl in class

anyway after school had CCA really miss tt guitar ensemble of mine although they all can b pains in my ass at times i really think tt they have become more discipline!..yupz..i think we need a lil bit more practice and we should b fine!..
got my new committee also!..haha..

after school set of home in the bus was crapping with claire gloria missy and sasa abt some guys bag tt was"esprite"..i mean a real GUY!!..haha..tts all lah..nothing much besides me having or mayb bringing problems to my self..the feeling sucks this is definatly not a good year for 4/3..everyonnehaving r/s probs and fam probs haiz..

NIC
//come back from NZ soon!//
//girl ar better recover fast k!!..then can go out//
//i'm really sorry abt wad i did..mayb i offended u but it was unknowing..guess i'll talk to u when ur more comfortable//
//hey bros..missed u guys alot!!..bro sa think hard k..bro glad..faster can!!..bro ade..we needa tok!!//
//PB i love u//
//aza and cyn thanks for the pinches..(thanks cyn for talking to me during recess)
//thanks D for my four star template//

2004-05-14T14:39:00.000+08:00

nic your skin has been downloaded by 30 people from blogskin. disadvantage means you're not the only one that has this skin. advantage is you're the first to have my skin and its rate 4 stars!!! you have a 4 **** star-ed skin!

d

HELLO HOME...GOODBYE EXAMS!!!(in school tt is)

2004-05-12T18:40:00.000+08:00

guess wad guys don b jealous but yes yes yes!!..i have been exempted from the exams..well tts wad Mrs Yip said to my mum lah!..yeah imagine man i have been at home since like sunday!!..home quarintine!!..haha..now i noe why the ppl hu had SARS broke their quarintine!!..yeah..doc said tt since the sch din wanna use my marks then i mite as well stay home and chill out plus all i have to do is do my papers in the comfort of my home and jus hand them in to the respective teachers lah tts all..so yeah!..

my poor cousin on the other hand was trying to contain the disease from me by wanting to visit me..hahah..poor kid din get a thing and ended up doing her exams this week!!..so guys rmbr!!..while u go out and enjoy urselves next week..I WILL B THERE!!...hahaha i wont b mugging!!..although its really sad that this happened to me at such an important year!!!...

Actually u mite think tt being at home is really fun and all but honestly u miss the laughter of ur friends and all their smiles..i really miss ppl like..Ade,Sharon,Sam,Lisa,Muni,Deb,Jo,Mel,Sharifah,Eileen,Tanya..jus all the ppl that mean alot to me..hah..yeah i even miss..Glad,Nik,Cynthia,my dear Aza..not forgetting jillian and claire,gloria..well jus alot of ppl!..also not forgetting my darling hu is sadly in the hospital!..yeah..I MISS YOU GUYS LIKE CRAZY!!!!..really cant wait to c u guyus when i get back to school!!..really miss the sec 4/3 "fever"..yeah..

anyway i think i am going to end of here..miss u guys like..F***..hahah!..

p.s to all the ppl that were there for my when i needed help..MUACKs..especially my HORNY BUNNY and NAT!

NIC

what happens to you when your world dies on you in one second...

2004-05-09T21:11:00.000+08:00

when the doctor opens his mouth and tells you that you have a virus that only children get
and that its unusal for you to get it and that you cant touch any child not even your cat
that your not allowed to enter into school till wednesday and that you have to do your exams all by urself when ppl are having fun...

F***ing shits lah..my mum wont let me take my papers in isolation she said "imagine if the teacher had kids?"..wad the hell do you have isolation rooms than !!..so full of shit k..i jus want to get this stupid exams don and over with!!...wad the hell man!!..right now i feel so F***ed up because i cant talk,i cant eat,i cant drink properly, i get irritated fast and i feel like smashing everyones face!!!..argh!!!..why the F*** did it have to happen to me!!..like now!!..wad the F*** man!!..i need to settle stuff and think and than you have this f***ed up virus attacking me!!....F*** to the world lah!!!..ARGH!!!!!!!!...

i really don noe wads going on anymore in my life everything seems so confusing...this virus my family my friends..everything is not going well for me..shits!!..one piont of time i feel guilty than the next thing u noe i feel i noe everything and then i become all f***ed up again and i feel like crying and getting help but these is like no one around to help me..than i wished i could get advice but noone seems to be around..my world is crashing on me every single second but i jus pretend like everything is ok..shits!..ARGH!!!!....I GIVE UP ON EVERY DARN F***ING THING!!!!....EVERYTHING JUS LET ME GO!!!

Freezing in the cold
Nic

*******There are people in this world who are going to hurt you,some purposefully,some accidentally,and somw who wont even realise they did it. they may make you start to doubt yourself or others,but if anything, you should start to doubt them******

2004-05-07T13:46:00.000+08:00

its not over between you and me and you now it..
guess we cant hide the truth..
guess the feelings are taking its toll on us..
we try to pretend its fine...
its not..but i don care...
i want it...i want it...i do...
but why don i see anything...
mayb its my selfishness...
i think it is...
because i am used to being more than this....
it's hard...but i am going to try...i will not give up...no not when we've come far...
its slow but we will try...
unless...u want out...
i need to noe ur feelings....
i really do...

*All we need is love and nothing else..nothing is a fairytale..*

Fighting the Rain
Nic
//.......................//i guess i wont be writing stuff to you
//......................//
//......................//
//......................//
//.......................//
//......................//

2004-05-04T20:43:00.000+08:00

hey hey..

been intoxicated in love and really don noe wads happening to me..
i'm soo confused with wads going on now..argh..friendship feelings are taking its toll on me
its hard really it is..i'm trying and i guess u are too but argh!!..its not working isit..F***..
i think i am in a dilema..its not tt i am confused but i cant think straight now..mayb ur rite tt i am a confused freak but...well..mayb..
its jus that this love thing is not going so well for me...always!!..
why me!!!..argh why did God choose me to be one of the few "luck" idiots to go through it..
suckz man!!...shits lah!!..i needa noe wads on ur mind badly..i really do..

hiding in the clouds
Nic
//....................................//
//hey girl don die on me kkk//
//i don noe wad to say..5lines//
//bros we always going thru the same thing..haha..why ar?..//
//hey cyn and az miss u guys..//
//PB wad to do!!//
//d i shal not say i love u coz u don like me to always say it.i miss u//

2004-04-29T19:11:00.000+08:00

beauty queen of only eighteen,she had some trouble with herself,she was always there to help her she always belonged to someone else,i drove myself miles and miles and woud up at your door i have had you so many times but somehow i want more

i dont mind spending everyday out on your corner in the pouring rain ,look for the girl with the broken smile ask her if she wants to stay awhile ,and she will be loved she will be loved

tap on my window knock on my door,i want to make you feel beautiful,i know i tend to get so insercure it does not matter anymore,its not always rainbows and butterflies its compromise that moves us along my heart is full and my door is always open,you can come anytime you want,

i know where you hide,along in your caar,know all of the things that make you who you are,i know that goodbyes means nothing at all,comes back and cegs me to catch her everytime she falls..
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
time has past and we are still moving on fine i don wanna lose this i really do inside..mayb wad u said abt ppl is true and tt we are js friends but i don really care coz ppl are ppl and we are jus us..

SUNSHINES
NIC
//i have no comments to u..//
//miss u babe.really do!!//
//hey mus mus mus study for exams ar..5lines//
//hey bros study hard now than enjoy later..//
//do i love jillian or wad!!//

2004-04-27T18:28:00.000+08:00

hey wads up..

haiz..been really sick these pass few days man..ever since tt bloody 2.4 crap..was kinda crappy lah..yeah

went for sharon's confirmation on sat could not believe tt mine would be the next day and tt i would be looking so damn girly haha..well i mus say my jonathan guy was cute and ahaha..saunders too lah..ahah..

enjoyed dinner on both nites was like seeing ur fav group of frens for one whole week..haha..yeah..althoug i wished some other ppl came along to lah..
was really nice looking at the stars with ppl u love and care for..haiz..

guess wad my mum found my report card tt i was planing to not show her haha..well she was upset but she has confidance in me and i am going to do it!!!..haha..
***************************************************************
read someone's blog today..i am sorry if i brought back memories tt u wanted to fade..i mean i feel heartless at times but i have to help u move on..mayb it was best if u din c me yeah..but i want the frenship to continue and tts why?..don u want tt too?..u noe u do have my frenship but i think it would be best if things stayed like this for a while more and mayb we can go back to the calls and all u noe..like when we were frens..i do miss the phone calls at nite the ILUs and the IMUS..i do think of it at times but i have to try and focus on wad is best..wad eva u have are not fantasies or dreams..u will always have me around i assure u k..if its me u miss i will be here..with my jokes and all..i'm sorry things became like this..i rmbr how we planned on this r/s and i do regret doing this but i cant be in this is u over posses me(mayb u din but i felt it)..i hope u understand..
***************************************************************
sorry abt tt pps but jus needed to tell someone how i felt..yeah..
u noe its hard to imagine tt at one time u nv thought abt long term stuff and now u do and then u regret giving up the first time and then again u dont..okokok
tts jus me and my blabbering haha..
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
wadeva happened yesterday i am sorry i should nv doubt in u or wad u feel...i guess i had it all wrong and all..plus i listened to wad ppl had to say and so yeah i am really sorry k?!...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
anyways ppl tts it for now..chiao!!

SUNSHINES
NIC
//read the stuff in the **...coloum//
//hey i really missed seeing u man thanks for coming to my grandmas place and for everything u did with me and for me..//
//hey hey my sunflower i love u!!..thanks for supporting me in everything and for understanding..//
//hey bros wads up..bro sa u take care of ur health ok!!..bro glad u ar..jus like ur big bro..tsk tsk..bro ade..love is nv and illusion no matter wad love is the best thing tt u can experience evn though its by urself..btw u guys always have me..//
//hey PB ilu!!!!!!!!//
//hey d thanks for all the changes u did for my blog i reallyx1000000....thank u!!//

2004-04-24T17:21:00.000+08:00

nic,

new template, which means it adds up to four templates. for clara, anishia, yours and mine. handmade. i hope you like it. the closest i can think of to punk. i will change the flooble colours later. mseals is down so i can't help you find any music. thanks to corbis for the photo, but i have no place to put credits. sigh... anyway, hope you like it

denise

2004-04-20T18:28:00.000+08:00

hey ppl..

guess its been a reallly long time since i blogged yeah..haha..either tt or i used songs to explain how i was feelings rite..well anyway this pass few days have been really great lah..oh besides yesterday when i got my report card haha nothing nice i guess..don plan to show it to mum and dad till after MYE...geex..oh on wednesday was really happy lah for those hu noe haha..i won the bet..and got it..well i am really happy abt it lah..but then again there are its pros and cons..haha..

on sat was really happy too..hahah..i had orals and i figured i did ok and guess wad we have new guitars now like yay!!!...hahah..then later came home and called sasa to meet her but guess wad she din respond so i stayed at home till 3 when she called so ended up meeting her and jill at 4 at interchange then three of us headed down to church for cat class..i am soo damn sad k i don noe but i think i am really going to miss all my cat class frens like alot alot..but come to think of it i am going to be confirmed wahahahah..sooooo happy..plus guys if u wanna c me in a skirt or dress 2BAD!!..i am wearing pants hahah..ok yeah so now my full name is..Nicolette Gloria Mark Sagaram..hahah..i am going to pray to st Mark from now on haha..ok jking lahz..

anyway after cat class i met my darling and decided to bring her to my fav special place..we were like standing for like sooo damn long ...P.S my legs were pain!!..then we managed to talk abt stuff tt we nv could talk abt coz there were like fights between us everytime we talk ahaha..(the long johns incident..)...so managed to talk without fighting..haha..mus buy 4D..then coz we like talked till damn late k..so my darling was real sweet she sent me home by cab..hahah..after all i done for her she better send me home by cab hahah...best part was we din finish talking so there i was in the cab talking again..haiz..my mouth was damn pain..then was kinda distracted while she was talking coz the bloody cab driver was playing some chinese music..and the stupid DJ was singing"happy burstday"..OMG like wad the hell rite then she was talking soo seriously and there i was abt to laugh ahahaha..wad the hell can..anyway mum and dad din scold me abt coming home late thank God!!..

then came sunday i went for mass hoping to meet some ppl but din haiz..so attended mass myself..(but annemarie was next to me lah and she was soo sweet she share book with me haha)..ok then met my fam coz we went to my uncles home for lunch and oh girl i miss TARA CLARE GERARD soooo much(my lil cousin)...i was babysitting her..was tiring but i did it outta love haha..

then monday came and had std test for accounts and guess wad i saw trisha!!!..like OMG i miss the B**** sooo much canz..haiz..then later studied with sharon,shellen and alison..was fun lah..then went home with jo and company was fun lah coz 'chu chu' was figuring out her scales..

then today was great been thinking abt some events lah during class time hahah..oh i din go for tamil lah was feeling sick then i had no choice but to skip tutorial and u noe wad was the stupidest thing i did i had eight name tags on me..so basically my name was like dammmnnnn long..haha..anyway went home with NIK tt girl was like bullying me in the bus can!!..haha she wrote.."nic sux"..so when she went off the buss i changed it to"nik sux"..hahah..smart yeah..came home and did my comb sci..proud of myself anyway i gtg nowz back to muggin tc

P.S tmr PFT 5 ITEMS...die die!!

sunshines
NIC
//hey u talent scouted i laugh..hahaha..jkin!//
//hey darling good to catch up on old times//
//hahah..i love u man..and its tt simple:)//
//hey bro sa..there is nv too lil time..so take as much as u want..bro ade..giving up and moving on mite sound easy but i know ur finding it hard don worry man u got ur bros here..bro glad..man u have the same advice tt i gave sa..chill brothers..love u guys..//
//aza and cyn long lost sisters!!!//
//i love my PB and i wanna thank her for being there//
//hey claire wad eva it is u can talk to me k?!//
//d!d!...i love u..ahaha..//

2004-04-12T19:28:00.000+08:00

hey..

today was really tiring man..haiz..i don noe why but yeah..many things happended things i can explain..i really don noe wad to do anymore..its difficult to be me yet ppl jus don get it they think they can jus come back into your life and pretend nothing happened..honestly i am not trying to be a wet blanket..but its true..i mean they don call or even say hello online..they want you to make the first move haiz..ok i shall stop nagging i sound like my mother haiz..i jus wanna slack and die..love sucks and life too...

****Me, Myself and I *****

All the ladies if you feel me, help me sing it now...

I can't believe i believed
Everything we had would last
So young and naive for me to think
She was from your past
Silly of me to dream of
One day having--------
Love is so blind
It feels right when it's wrong

I can't believe i fell for four years
And i'm smarter than that
So young and naive to believe that with me
You're a changed ---
Foolish of me to compete
When you cheat with loose women
It took me some time but now i moved on

Cuz i realized i got
Me myself and i
That's all i got in the end
That's what i found out
And it ain't no need to cry
I took a vow that from now on
I'm gonna be my own best friend

Me myself and i
That's all i got in the end
That's what i found out
And it ain't no need to cry
I took a vow that from now on
I'm gonna be my own best friend

So controlling , you said that you love me
But you don't
Your family told me one day
I would see it on my own
Next thing i know i'm dealing
With your ---------- and my home
I've been so blind
It feels right when it's wrong

Now that it's over
Stop calling me
Come pick up your clothes
No need to front like you're still with me
All your homies know
Even your very best friend
Tried to warn me on the low
It took me some time
But now i am strong

Because i realized i got
Me myself and i
That's all i got in the end
That's what i found out
And it ain't no need to cry
I took a vow that from now on
I'm gonna be my own best friend

Me myself and i
That's all i got in the end
That's what i found out
And it ain't no need to cry
I took a vow that from now on
I'm gonna be my own best friend

Me myself and i
I know that i will never disappoint myself
All the ladies if you feel me
Help me sing it now
Ya, you hurt me
But i learned a lot along the way
After all the rain
You'll see the sun come out again
I know that i will never disappoint myself

sunshines
NIC
//good for u tt ur not course-less..yay?//

//hey wads up girl..mus come for my confirmation k//

//sorry abt today yeah..haha..i think its my fault..oOps?!..//

//yo bros wdas up..don worry abt love k..//

//hey aza and cyn wads up..no worries cyn abt easter vigil glad to support!//

//if there was one girl i love it would be my PB jillian..bleahx//

2004-04-08T23:39:00.000+08:00

hey everyone today was a real cool day we din have 6 periods of lessons..but guess wad nic was really good today..hahah..did maths all the time k..haha..even during accounts..yupz..later on was kinda scary coz miss chua talked to my class then to me abt my tamil,then joanna and she says she wants to talk to ade also haha..anyway the song of the day is...

LOST PROPHETS---LAST TRAIN HOME
**Verse 1

To every broken heart in here
Love once was apart but now it?s disappeared
She told me that it?s all but of the choices that you make
And...
Even when you think you liked you have to give to take

Chorus

But there?s still tomorrow, forget your sorrow
And I can be on the last train home
Watchin pass the day as it fades away
No more time to care, no more time?.. Today

(But we sang) If were going nowhere
(Yeah we sang) If it?s not enough
(And we sang) Sing without a reason
To ever fall in love...

Verse 2

I wonder if you?re listening
Picking upon the signals sent back within
Sometimes it feels like I don?t really know what?s going on
Time and time again, its seems like everything is wrong in here

Chorus

But there?s still tomorrow, forget your sorrow
And I can be on the last train home
Watchin pass the day as it fades away
No more time to care, no more time?.. Today

(But we sang) If were going nowhere
(Yeah we sang) If it?s not enough
(And we sang) Sing without a reason
To ever fall in love...

But we sang if were going nowhere
Yeah we sang if it?s not enough

(And we sang) Sing without a reason
To ever fall in love...

(But we sang) If were going nowhere
(Yeah we sang) If it?s not enough
(And we sang) Sing without a reason
To never fall in love... Fall in love? again..

To never fall in love again x2**

sunshines
Nic
// don noe wads ur prob now days?//

//sorry abt the handphone thing k!!..yupz!//

// i donnoe wwads on ur mind and how u feel..//

//hey bros..good to knoe tt thinhgs are looking on better then before yeah..i guess..haha//

//not been talking to u guys cyn abd aza..sadness man..//

//hey my PB i love u and miss u alot thanks for helping her..yeah//

//D thanks for the papers!!love u//

2004-04-06T17:19:00.000+08:00

wads up yeah'll!!..nothing much to blog abt lah..jus tt somethings in my life are not really going ok?..yupz..anyway there can be no better way to describe my life now with MAROON 5's THIS LOVE:

*****I was so high I did not recognize
The fire burning in her eyes
The chaos that controlled my mind
Whispered goodbye and she got on a plane
Never to return again
But always in my heart

This love has taken its toll on me
She said Goodbye too many times before
And her heart is breaking in front of me
I have no choice cause I won't say goodbye anymore

I tried my best to feed her appetite
Keep her cumming every night
So hard to keep her satisfied
Kept playing love like it was just a game
Pretending to feel the same
Then turn around and leave again

This love has taken its toll on me
She said Goodbye too many times before
And her heart is breaking in front of me
I have no choice cause I won't say goodbye anymore

I'll fix these broken things
Repair your broken wings
And make sure everything's alright
My pressure on your hips
Sinking my fingertips
Into every inch of you
Cause I know that's what you want me to do

This love has taken its toll on me
She said Goodbye too many times before
And her heart is breaking in front of me
I have no choice cause I won't say goodbye anymore

This love has taken its toll on me
She said Goodbye too many times before
And her heart is breaking in front of me
I have no choice cause I won't say goodbye anymore

This love has taken its toll on me
She said Goodbye too many times before
And her heart is breaking in front of me
I have no choice cause I won't say goodbye anymore...*****

Sunshines
Nic
//have not heard fromu?..//

//hey missed u alot yeah?..well good tt we caught up during lentern vigil//

//i don noe wad to say coz i don wanna confuse u..//

//hey bros..bro sa try on the 15th k?..hahah..bro ade don freak out abt the friendster thing k?..bro glad..haha..i have no comments for u besides..keep up the work!..ahaha..//

//hey aza and cyn have not been in touch with u guys since lentern vigil..sobz//

//missin u all....//

2004-04-02T18:11:00.000+08:00

I'M LIVING WITH THE GHOST OF YOU AND ME!!

for all the things if done and if i have hurt anybody in anyway i'm sorry i guess i have not been me recently..sorry linette abt tt day but i noe u were pissed so was i k?..i will nv steal from my buddy k!!..

today was a f***ed up day k..madam azna used my f***ing name and embarresed mr in front of the whole sec four level tamil girls!!..i mean wad the f*** can! i was not even around when she addressed those ppl can..u noe wad..yes i admite coz of me and someone else according to YOU will not be able to give the school a hundred percent pass for tamil..but u noe wad i don give a F*** abt wad YOU think!!..since primary 5 i never passed me tamil ok..and my parents think tt its a f***ing waste of time for me to learn tt subjet..by insulting me mayb coz i am a prefect or a student leader mite have definatly felt good to YOU rite well YOU jus F*** off!!!...BITCH!!!...

sorry abt tt ppl..now we all noe y i was not me today..

went to the doc today to get my M.C coz i was suffering from constipation..haiz..sad rite..also funny for me..haha..anyway i will be going for lentern vigil!!..yay..cant wait to c someone..haha..btw ppl pray for me coz i got tamil oral tmr!..bye for now

sunshines
NIC
//i'm sorry..//

//cant wait to c u tmr..heard u were out with ur angel yeah..hmm..hanky panky yeah..//

//i really want u to noe tt i'm not going to treat u like how u were treated before i respect ur feeling and all k..love ya//

//hey bros wads up!!..bro glad..i guess its best to jus take time yeah..bro sa..moving on is really hard but we can do it together..(i hope)..bro ade its great to c u as u nowdays..btw its ok to miss someone!//

//aza and cyn u idiots!!!..put tt bloody tempon on my table!!..sooooo pai seh can! than can say happy april fool's day!..wth//

2004-03-30T17:15:00.000+08:00

hey me again..

this entry is basically for someone:

u act as if i am the one who forced u to hold on and as if i was the bastard tt lead u on i don noe wad i did to make u place ur hopes soo damn high..yes i love u i nv denied it but its time to let go and you know it..things like this cant last foreva once u left school..imagine if u were in poly and one day u come up to me and tell me tt u wanna let go..imagine wad state i would be in..i don get y ur sooo selfish..u nv were selfish..

u have changed sooo much since u have left school..God noes why but honestly ur screwing ur life..i don noe how but tts how i feel i nv said anything like..i might want to patch or this might have another chance..yes i said i want u but i also said tt i don want to get into this r/s again...i asked u once before and u said no because of wad i said..the reason why i am letting go is so tt u can be straight and not hang on to me till u feel like ur feelings are fading..i mean there are so many other ppl in the world who are GUYS and who are better then me so why make a big fuss over this..when u broke with HER..u din even act like this but i don understand y ur doing it to me..i don flirt around in school ok..btw wad u said abt me flirting in school coz of my big ego or to boost my identity is fucking shit k!!!..u noe tt tt was the most fucked up hurting shit u eva said to me..but mayb it also made me realise tt u actually felt tt way abt me..tt i was a jerk rite..soo tell me yeah..why the fuck do you wanna be with a jerk?!?!...

man i really think u have an AP and u really needa check on it coz for the FISRT time its driving me NUTS!!!..all i wanted was for u to understand me tts all..i din ask u to cry and whin..i still want to be frens but i don think its gonna work if u act like this...

************************************************************

hey everyone sorry abt tt

anyway so far my week has been full of crap and shit firstly i wanna say sorry to someone i think u noe who u are k..i din mean to get u pissed and all..and i really don **** you k..ok next school has beeen really tough i cant believe my MYE is like in three weeks man..and i only revised sec three stuff..shit i am sooo gonna die..OHH..and thanks to miss wu now we have new strings!!..haha..finally and now i think my CCA rocks coz of all the praise and worship there..great man!!..haha..anyway nothing much has been happening lah will keep u updated..haha

sunshines
NIC

//..................................i don noe wad to say anymore........//

//hey really looking forward to seeing u during lentern vigil..//

//hey pts!!..jus wanna say tt i love u!!..//

//hey bros wads up..hey glad make the move man i think its long enuff!!..haha..bro sa i shall not say more to u..bro ade abt wad happen today don worry k..relax ur soo stressed!!!..//

//hey aza and cyn..thanks and sorry for everything k..frens!?..//

//thanks soooo much D for all u have dpon for me really love u!!//

//rachie i love u sweetcakes don worry k..4/3ians all here 4 u!!//

2004-03-27T20:25:00.000+08:00

hey everyone its me nic again after a very looooong break yeah...

haha..heard from alot of u guys that u have been missing me..haha..ok shall not be a jerk..
hmm..well this week has been a real great hustle!..btw for those hu noe..my dad is still not talking to me..yupz..ok yeah monday was jus a damn F***ed up day..coz i had to miss CCA(but was actually good!)..went home at 3 coz the com guy was coming ended up he cam at 4.30..wad the hell..so jus sat in my home watching MTV..hahah..ok tt was lame..anyway..sadly on monday my com left me..haiz..i felt a part of my torn up..

tuesday was a stressful day had to learn my cheer for sports day which was also F***ed up coz i cant dance for shit..and plus those steps does not match my label..i felt soo embarrased trying to learn it k..oh btw thanks aza and cyn for waiting for me..really swt of u guys..OHHHH...SORRY SHALYN!!!..i really din c u in the canteen k..muacks!!..ahaahah..reached home and heard the news abt ah kaus papa..felt really sad and could not concentrate during tution..haiz..
wednesday i din go for council meeting which was cancelled in the end..went with melissa,joanna,sharifah,prisca,lisa,sam,catharine and rachie to her papa's wake..haiz..was like controling the tears but..ok shall not say..guess it was really a period of mouring for the class too..had no mood to go down to SP to meet aza and cyn for some cultural fest thing..but i promised them so i went..haha..was kinda late(oOoOPPPS!)..but had a great time lah..going out with those bummers cheered me up a lil lah!..thanks again guys..

thursday came..now tt was the worst day of mt entire week!..it was cheer from1.45-2.30..then from 3.30 to 7.30pm!!..omg..it was really pressurizing..i was the only idiot hu was damn extra craming every step in my head from three diff songs..man it was damn tiring,then my legs were like aching like hell!!!!...u noe i can even go to the toilet properly!!..sooooooo pain..haiz..then had tution was like half sleeping k!..-yawnzz-..had to be at TP at like 5 AM k!!!!..CRAZY RITE!!!..
But yeah was there like the first wth joanna..hey joa next year we shall be the first again k!!:D..haha..
then the sad thing was we had new stepd!!!...wth rite..but we learnt it can...btw i have o say this on my blog..no offence k..but i bakitha house ppl "stole" some parts of our routine..was damn pissed abt it..but "forgive and forgot!!"..yupz!..was proud later on when my 2/7 was running!!..but sad tt they got disqualified..haiz..nvm in my eyes they got second!!..yupz!!..anyway..went home with Nik and mel..was suppose to meet nik at 2.30 but guess wad..while patting my cat i fell aslp on the floor without bathing..gross rite..yeah..got up at 2.30 and tried to call nik..but i dialed the bloody wrong number..wad the hell rite even msged the person!!..so PEI SEH!!!..haiz..nvm..(nic covers face)..so ended up slping..haha went to church and pretended tt i din c someone singing..HU AR?!?..hahah..but the person was nice enuff to say hi..haha..

sat came and i like had to get up sooo early to be in school at 8 fro tutorial then had CCA and ACIES..CCA was in the canteen soo fun can..haha..ACIES was really nice..nv bring AZA to curia..hahah..now she is in love with Brother michael..haha..jus bring her along when u wanna steal FOOOOOOODD!!!..haha..OHHHH btw there was this cute guy tt was there and we kept looking at eachother during curia..OMG
!!!!!..he is cute!!!..ok nic realx!!..during mass..cyn was trying to block me from seeing my "UTT"..and guess wad happened..she fell.well sat according to her on the bench..hahah..and there was this..haha..loud sound..haha..coz the chair..haha..moved back..haha..coz she ..hhahahah..lost balance..wahahahaha...ok shall not be mean..sorry cyn!!..love u kk..haha..poor girl..later went to eat at marche with glad,ade,sharon,mel,ped,cher and janet..and now here i am again sitting and typing shit..

gtg..

p.s:cyn asked me to update..aha
NIC!

//hey sorry abt thus k.. i think i am acting like a jerk towards u rite..heard abt it from sa..sorry k..but i need time..and i am sorry if u get hurt k..but i need time!//

//we both have driffted far enuff..i guess i don noe u anymore..guess its true tt friendships don last forever..sadly//

//hey sorry abt friday k..!!!..love u~//

//hey bros we all four needa go out together one day k..glad suggested this!//

//hey aza and cyn realised tt u guys are great legionaries..with an attitude..haha..K.I.P!! PS.nic loves u!//..haha

2004-03-20T13:51:00.000+08:00

hey hey hey!!!..yes my people Nic is back in the house to rock your world..wahahahha..bet u guys missed me soooooo much rite..hahaha..well guess wad i think this would be a really really loooooooooonnnnnnnggggg enrty..to start things off first of all...let's start with tuesday..

had to do my CIP at orchardd..ngee ann city's dairy queen was really fun i had gone down with jia yi and her fren dinny..well tts wad she calls him..yeah anyway..was really cool asking for donations i bet doing this CIP would have been definatly more fun the the ones that my other classmates had done cos in the end we had free cones!!!..rocks rite!!..yea..oh and btw our sningaporeans are bloody selfish..not all..jus some lah..the japs are damn "act dumb"..but the wites were jus damn generous..did u noe tt one lady actually donated not coz she wanted her free cone but because she said that i looked really poor thing under the rain..awe!!!.soooo swt rite..hahah..after tt i tried calling my dear fren Aza who din pick up her phone sooo poor nic ended up going home instead of meeting that lamer and cyn..haha..yupz..

then on wednesday was like dammmmnnnn FREE!!!! ccoz my parents were like out of town for the day so since i was going to be soo bored in the morning coz my bro would be at school,i decided to call anishia and asked her if i could come over jus for fun..so since she said ok..i arranged to go to her home at 9 AM!!!....hahah...so went there used her com coz that was the only time i could check stuff then later sat down and talked rubbish and oh btw thanks anishia for letting me sleep at ur place..hahah..can u imagine going to ur frens house not to talk but to slp..wahahahaha..yupz then after that decided to follow anishia to meet d coz d had been missing me since 27th..rite d!!!..hahah..so yes met d and as usual i felt short..then i said my goodbyes wished them luck and i headed down to school for CCA after CCA me and mel decided to hang out at TM where we meet lisa,clara,d and anishia..so hanged out with lisa most of the time coz those three were jus ggoing GAGA over stuff which of course me and lisa were nnot into at all!!...hahah..later ani came over to my place..apparently she has changed her perspective of cats coz from wad i hear she is in love with rusty..haha..bet rusty loves her too..but loves me MORE!!!!!...had dinner with my bro and i guess we sorta bonded lah!!..then my good fren Aza called and someone jus refused to put down the phone even tough i was dead tired!!..

then came thursday..well i guess nothing much happened..i think!.hhah..got up at 8 the time that legion started!!..this i have to blame Aza for!!!...reached school at 8.45 haiz..was trying to get my ear stud into my ear but to NO avail!!..haiz..anyway was damn free from 9.30 till 1 so decided to ggo and have breakfast down at macs Tm with Aza and Cyn so yes as usual i was bbullied by those two modern dancers..thhey were either "stealing" my money for free cones..or pincing my butt for God noes wad reason..and now were are united by...DRINKING TEA!!!!..ok nvm only those two would understand wad i mean..hahah..yeah met gloria,claire,danielle and some of their frens at macs to..saw clara and krystle proud of them man!!..yups..finished our wonderful breakfast and headed back to school where i peied those two till 5 mins before me CCA ..after CCA followed mel to buy her geog n level series..called my darling and spoke to her..honestly don noe why i called lah.but was lost for words after some time..hhaha..then later on my darling was soo swt..i guess..haha..she msged mel's phone to ask if i was still around coz i guess she had noone to have dinner with..i guess i was the last resort!..haha..well could not meet her..went ome and my father founfd out abt my ear being pierced he was damn pissed with me..oOps!!..yeah then i told my mum abt my ear and yes she was very upset abt it..hey mum and dad noe u wont see this but i am sooooo sorry i let u guys down k!!..haiz.currently me and my dad are not talking but mum has decided to forgive me so we both are getting along fine..

then came friday..had geog tutorial..was suppose to start at 8 but ended up starting at 8.30..good thing was that social studies tutorial was cancelled coz miss julianna was not feeling well..so went down to TM macs for breakfast..AGAIN!!...saw clara mopping man tt girl needs more power..haha..jie don get angry k!!..then went to give chantel her prezzie from ade coz she jus came back from aust..i promise man i really missed ade when she was away!!..coz there was no one to listen to my crap!..then walke daround isetan for a while..ohhhhh btw me,mel and ade was like walking around and around the mango shop coz they were playing the hits from the dirty dancing soundtrack so yeah..wahhh damn nice man!...then some police man saw our whole group of frens and then it wassooo scary coz they asked us how come we were soo free..so we told them that it was the holidays and that we jus finished tutorials so they jus smiled and said see you around..haha..then came home and sorta slacked..then later went to church for mass and stations...had tution..and yes miss Aza called and as usual din let me put down the phone so yeah..ended up slping at 11.30!!..and i needed to be in school by 6.15!!!//haiz..anyway...

today is sat and we had the walkathon thing was really fun for me haha had to team up with shir..well i guess i learnt something new abt her..she might seem like the "nic ur an asshole" sorta person but i realised that she is actually really swt and nice..and i guess i can trust her with anything.real fun being around u girl!!...btw i was a real good girl..shir was the one bullying me!!aha..took many many pics together was really happy abt tt!!!..yup..bbut then later when i got back to school trouble struck!..all my sec threes din come for CCA!!!...ahhhh..miss wu wants to c all of them on monday and i think i am going to be as good as dead..btw proud off my mummy coz she won a prize for the most hairiest legs..ahah..even my classmates were proud of her!!..now i am getting ready to go for cat class..meeting alyssa at the bus stop at 3,45 then attending mass with my darling and having dinner..guess wad ma nd my mummy are going to body world tmr!!..yeah..she tell u guys abt it sooon!!!....gtg now cya

sunshines

Nic
//hey thanks for letting me bunk in ur home..friends always kkkkk...//

//hey girl have not really been talking to u guess ur growing up too fast for me and i think we are loosing our friendshipp..-feeling hopeless-//

//hey nik thanks for taking care of my wallet yeah aand oh btw...i think i look cool in the CWO outfit!!//

//hey bros today was really cool seeing u guys and bonding with u all..well din really bond with ade and glad but i think me and sa make great bros..rite sa..hahah//

//hey aza and cyn was really ffun going out with u buggers mus do it again k..on one condition..PLS DON TORTURE MEEEEEEE!!!//

//hey denise thanks soooooo much for doing this blog and updating it for me love u like hell//

//mum and dad i din mean to be a bad girl i jus wanted to do something crazy tt day..i really wwanted to tell u guys but i noe guys wont get it..i mean when i did it before u guys were pissed but u let me a\have b\it and so i tot it wont bother if i did it again..really sorry!!!!//

//LINETTE WONG TOLD U NOT TO CUT UR HAIR NOW U GOING TO GET IT ON MONDAY!!..HAIZ..//

2004-03-18T11:29:00.000+08:00

d and ani were talking yesterday while waiting for clara... ani and d were talking about lisa and then the devil appeared... then nic went down to meet ani, d and clara as well, god knows why... but in the end, she bonded with her bro instead of with d, ani and clara! how irritating!

so clara, ani and d played a trick on them. when they weren't paying attention to us, we hurriedly ran to the stairs and ran away from them... WHOOOOSH! that was fun ain't it guys? then we still strolled, after that ate at ya kun cause d wanted to eat the butter toast...

were waiting for chantel, but suddenly everybody needed to rush home... oh! and we met alison too... HI ALISON! so nic shared a cab with d and ani home... ani paid.. she had a hundred dollar bill!

`denise updating

2004-03-17T15:29:00.000+08:00

denise and anishia invading and being naughty again!!!

okay, let's tell you wat nic did today...first, nic met ani...then headed to tampines to meet d....!!!d and nic were overjoyed to see each other...ever since the 27th they hadnt seen each other...how saddddddddd!!!..

ani: nic took forever to leave ani's house. she was like taking ages and ages and ages to get ready which got ani late in meeting d and in turn ALMOST late for her VERY impt interview at tp!!!..which btw, didnt go well!! rite d????? -d nods-!!

d: nic was such a dragggggggg... she took soooooooooooooo long to change... she didn't even want to meet me at first... I WON'T FORGIVE NIC!!! and she blamed me for not being to recongise her voice! right!

we're gonna entertain you for the next two weeks or so, because our darling nic has crashed with a virsus! HOW SADDDDDD... so currently, nic is in school, doing some paper work for her CCA - guitar... other then that we don't know whats up with her, and frankly don't really care... :x ok, we're off...

`anishia and denise updating

2004-03-12T20:37:00.000+08:00

Today was really very fun..after some stuff that happened last nite its a good thing tt i went out to chill with my bro and mel today!..yupz!..mum woke me up at 9.25..25minutes later!!..hahah..and i was suppose to meet the gang at 9.30..so called ade and asked her to get the tickets first jus incase..so anyway left the house at 10 am..(movie starts at 10.10 btw)...best part bus broke down but thank God it was near the MRT station so i ran with the guitar to the station..then ran up the escalator to meet mel and ade..who were waiting for me at btw the time was 10.10 but we still took our time to buy our food the went to the cinama..was still early and guess wad there was only 5 ppl inside!!..three of ur and a couple(a bung and her girl)..

i tell u man dirty dancing is a damn nice pic man tts if u love latino dancing!!..hahah..was jus amazing the swings the sways and the moves u jus wanna dance and let all ur troubles fly away!..and the songs are EXCELLENT!!!..tt after the show we went to MJ to c if we could puchase the sound track but guess wd it was all sold out!!..tts how good the songs were!..i don care i want tt sound track bad!!..haha..after that i felt like doing something real stupid so wad else can u do at TM then get ur ear pierced!..so i got an upper ear piercing..nv imagined i would do it..and ppl truth is..IT DOES NOT HURT!!..which idiot told me tt it did iwanna kill U!!..then after tt went to yamaha to check out thier new picks..then went to i cant remember where and then it was time for me to meet MUNI!!!..yes coz we were going jamming!..on the way down met my darling!!..OMG i MISS her like sooooooooooooooooo MUCH!!! and she was sooo shocked to see my ear coz i noe tt she wanted to pierce it too..hahha..so she tried to hit my poor ear out of jealousy..haha..anyway really happy to see her!..

Meet muni hu was soo poor thing coz she was waiting for me and danielle who came half an hour late!.haha..yeah then the four of us(ade had to leave for aust..)took 38 down to veron's house but mel continued homw lah..went to her house and jammed was sooooo fun!!..hahah..cant imagine i have to sing!!..AHHHHH...was there at like 2.30..and needed to leave at four when our dear debbie came in haiz so ended up leaving..took a cab home and was trying to figure a way to hide my piercing..in the end i decided to take it out..took out my ear stick and realised tt i could not put it in..haiz!!

reached home sat infront of the mirror trying to get the stick in which eventually fell outta my hands..so in the end i put the stud on!..haiz..and now am using was little hair i have to cover up!!..very scared of wad mum mite say!!..ahhhh!!!...now i am sitting in front of this darn machine telling u abt my day..and after this i shall go to read my ADRAIN MOLE book..damn dirty but COOL:)!!..hahaha..bye!

Sunshines!,
Nic
//i don feel affected by wad u said last nite i don need u as a pts..i have got a great one already..thans for being concern abt my studies though...(nic wished to say more but cant..haiz)//

//HEY U JEALOUS FREAK!!!..bet u wanna have tt ear pierced huh?!..ear ichy now rite..wahahaha!!!!!..haha..ok nic shall not be mean to her darling!..love ya..glad i saw u today!//

//hey pts!..missed yeah dude eh can pei me to legion?!..yes rite!!..thanks!!!..love yea!//

//hey bros wads up..bro ade i noe ur in aust now but take care k!..bro sa..DON FORGET THE COUNCIL T-SHIRT!!!...bro glad..wads up in love man u free to catch up on sat or do u have a date?!?..hmm??..//

//dear cynthia been missing u(not!!)..have not seen u in a while yeah(wish i don c yeah..yuks!)..been thinking abt u(think till i wanna vomit!!)..see yeah soon(PLS LAH!!..don wanna c u!!)//

//MY LETCHMI!!..ilove u and miss u that i even wanna kiss u..come to muthu's fish head curry for a surpire!!//..love muthu(p.s i am ramachandran!!)

"I realised too late that i din wanna let go now i have nothing to look forward too anymore.."

2004-03-10T21:49:00.000+08:00

today was crapped up with stuff i cant recall
its all mixed up as if my day had a huge fall,

first it was laughing and joking with firends,
then it was rushing to pass up my articles before the day ends,

as a prefect responsibilities i had
so i could not go to RTC as that would be bad,

was really fun during council meetings
as we had to do many printings,

designing our own council t'shirt was fun,
but now me and lisa had to check things out tmr in the sun!

its colours are really cool coz its orange and black
but it might be expensive so we needa check,

to make one bloody t is like 25
and to get the money is gonna be a great big dive,

but jus at ur foot came some luck
a t for only jus 10 bucks,

.....geex ok now tts enough of poetry for me!!..anyway i hope tt so called xplained half my day..c ya

sunshines
Nic
//LoVe XpReSsEs tT wHiCh cAn'T B pUt iN2 WoRdS N Tt wHicH cAn'T eAsIlY b FoRgOtTeN//

//hey girl have not communicatted since sunday i guess the shick mus have died down by now!//

//hey din c ya for like two days in a row missing my sunflower!!!//

//hey bro glad sorry abt this morning lah u noe i love to play rite!..hahah..bro sa don worry abt u noe wad k..jus do wad u want and wad u think is rite..bro ade..jus a big thaks for being there yeah//

//cyn u ar bully me today!!!..don be mean to ur seniors kkk!!!..hahah//

"MUSIC EXPRESS THAT WHICH CANNOT BE PUT INTO WORDS AND THAT WHICH CANNOT REMAIN SILENT"....PFA COUNCIL...

2004-03-06T22:15:00.000+08:00

Hey everyone!..today was really fun!!..yes i was an Entreprenur today!..yes yes..the school sent us for this really cool workshop coz i guess it was "enterprise day" or something!..haha..nicolette,denise lim and myself were in the same group..then sadly we were seperated to our sub-groups..sadly were could only communicate through sign language..hahah..the lecture from this guy was really boring to the extent tt nik almost fell aslp..haha..had this guy in my group tt everyone was crazy abt..but sadly he din have like a pretty boy name..it was"JOHN"..yew!!..but the fun all started after lunch when they all were trying to get his pic with either their camera phones or cameras..we would pretend to pose in front of his group of friends to get his pic.haha..in the end we did get it..so YEAH for nik and lianne!.haha.oh yes and by the way the people ther loved our school sooo much coz we all like participated in everything..haha..we were also known for our"St.anthony's wave!"..haha..hossan leong thought tt we we awesome!..haha..i think we showed tt our school would always the best!..GO SAC!..ok..i shall stop being soo bhb..btw din say tt i liked this guy called abel..he was soooo damn HOT!!!!!..but then Nik kept saying tt he was a homo!..but i don think so..he is HOT,HOT,HOTTTTT~~~~~...!!!!..ok relax nic!!..whew!..ok yeah left the school and went to meet my darling for mass in church was lk irritating her the whole service can..sorry darling!!..shall try to b a good girl kkkk!!..haha..yeah..then later followed her for dinner and saw SACIANS..argh..i think they might get funny tots..oOps?!..mus clear things in school..walked her home and yeah lah..we both were like damn damn damn damn damn...HIGH!!!!..thank God for sanity or i think we would be in hougang chalet!..haha..meet my parents on the bus and was chilling with them..really enjoyed today..haiz..since tt day i have nv felt so great things are soooooooooooooooooo much better...anyway tts it..

love
NIC
//i don noe wads up with u but nvm..if u need to noe i don feel hurt or guilt anymore..yes i did have faults but i think i made a great decision and anyway ur only pissed which means with the state ur in things would be easier to get over..//

//hahah..hey muz go out togehter more dude..fun rite being high!..i still wanna be the princess!!//

//stewart u stupid girl irritating me in the hall then drop ur sim card in my bag..ahah..still love u though..tell lianne to get a life she will nv have.."john!"..hahah//

//hey bros don noe how ur lives have been but will always be here for u guys!!//

2004-03-04T21:32:00.000+08:00

hey...
was feeling down the whole morning..mayb thoughts and memories frome last nite jus kept haunting me..haiz..i really din want to let HER go soo soon but i jus guess i rather do it now than for both of us to suffer later on..i mean no offence i don want to end up like my bro sa..i realised yesterday that my N'levels are important and that they come before HER so i did wad i thought was best..its not that i don love HER or anything..it's jus tt i don want to hurt HER...felt really letargic during the whole lesson time and felt like crap..

after school call my darling and asked her wad time she was free to go for our so called "lunch date"..hahaha..yeah called her and she said to call back at 2.30 so i followed ade to go and buy cake for denise tan..btw..HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!..yeah..then after tt ade decided to pei me to the bus stop to meet her oh yeah Cher also tagged along..stupid girl came at like 3.00pm!!..argh so yeah i had ice kachang for lunch,ade had cheng teng, cher had..i cant remember..and darling had iced longan(tasted gross to me!!)..then after tt ade and cher had to go for legion so me and my darling jus slacked at the market and talked abt alot of stuff..was catching up i guess..then later on at aron 5.45pm we left the market and walked down to Tanah Merah MRT station coz she had to go to city hall to meet someone..haha..guess who i saw there..RACHIE!!!..and Jac lah!..haha..i think they both we shocked to c us there..yeah..anyway..followed her down to cityhall coz din want her to go alone..

came home at abt 7.10pm was rushing to get ready for tuition then realised he was not coming today lah..soo in the end i was slackign at home watching t.v..studied for abt and hour and here i am blogging..well tts abt my 'wonderful' day lah..bye

love
NIC
//i guess its over for go and we cant turn back anymore.."learn from the past,cherish the present and look forward to the future"..i really am missing u even though it does not seem like it..nc meant to hurt u like this but sometimes i have to think abt myself i am not being selfish or leaving u for anyone..i don want to get into this stuff after u..thanks for all your love,for all your misses..bye..i still wanna b frens//

//hey thanks soo much for spending today with me k..i really needed someone tt i could talk to,to be there for me..really appreciate it alot..see u on sat k!

//hey hey hey..miss going home with u girl..must go home togetehr sooooon!!!//

//hey bros..sa,think abt wad u really want kk..don do things for her if u are going to hurt..ade, its good to noe tt ur moving on..glad,haiz u ar..faster make up ur mind can anot!!!...hahaha//

"only he noes how i really feel how much i hurt inside how confused i feel without you by my side,let go and move on is the right thing to do,but how can i when i miss you soo much too,mayb i was wrong and want you back,mayb i was right to end all this shit and fights.."